THE   GOLDEN        
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN A THOUSAND  YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM  A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP,  WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
         BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.        
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN  THE SAME 
 PLACE LONG. IN  THE DAY  SHE  SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE SHE SOLD HER WARES, AND  IN  THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A  REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT  THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER,  SHE BECAME A  LITTLE TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT   ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN  EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING  FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE  HID THE  CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER  THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND   THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I MEAN)) AND  AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD  IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL  THAT OF A COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO INFAMITY.  HOWEVER HE 
 WAS KIND  OF A HARDHAT  AND  DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING.  THE TAVERN DIDN'T CARE  FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND  ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS IN  THE  PROCESS OF  FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE  FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE    VOWED   TO   LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT  KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT  THAT EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE  SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS  JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED OUT OF THE  CART  BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT,  AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!