THE   GOLDEN         
              M               
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN  A THOUSAND YEARS  AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM  A  TAVERN AFTER  A 
 FEW  YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF  A  CART, NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN  THE  DAY SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE SHE SOLD HER  WARES, AND  IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS  FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.  SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME A  LITTLE  TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON   HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH  LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON ENOUGH  THERE  CAME A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED  WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE HID  THE  CART,  AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER  THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE   CART.  HE  WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND  AS  SUCH HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE  WASN'T ALL THAT OF A COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN  M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND  OF A HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING. THE TAVERN  DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD  EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS IN  THE PROCESS  OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE  FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT  HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR  WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE  SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH  FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE  GOT SCAMMED OUT OF THE CART  BY 
 A MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT,  AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!