THE  GOLDEN          
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A  THOUSAND YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE EMERGED  FROM  A  TAVERN AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO  BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN THE  DAY SHE SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE  SHE  SOLD HER WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED  IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT THE  GOLDEN  M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A  LITTLE TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN   HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION. SHE  FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON ENOUGH  THERE  CAME A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING  FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE  HID  THE CART, AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN  NAMED 
 NICHOLAS   FOUND  THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED, I  MEAN))  AND  AS SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT  IT A GOOD IDEA TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT  OF A  COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME  RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY  FELL INTO INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A  HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY  HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS  IN  THE  PROCESS OF FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR  NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS   FOOD,   HE    VOWED    TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW  MUCH ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP  ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR COW  MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE  EARTH FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN  HE GOT SCAMMED OUT OF THE CART  BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS, WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!