dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for  a   second 
 everything  is completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind.  it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i  realize  i can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such is my  nature.  turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but  time  does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything of  this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense  though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if  you wander too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick  on the  nose, that's 
 what these  are. like you do with  a cat 
 who comes  to  close to your sandwich...