METALS                  
                                    
                                          
 HEY  HUM.  METALS ARE USED FOR MAGIC  OR 
 CONSTRUCTION OF LARGE OR SPECIAL THINGS. 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 COPPER    USED  FOR  CLOCKS  AND BELLS, 
 COMMUNICATING WITH  OLD BEINGS,  AND  BY 
         IDIOTS FOR KILLING TREES         
                                          
 MERCURY    USED  FOR  PROLONGING  LIFE, 
 TRANSFERRING INTO OTHER DIMENSIONS, AND  
           FOR ELECTRICAL LIGHTS          
                                          
 SILVER  THE  MOON  METAL,  USED TO LURE 
 AND  COMMUNICATE WITH  CANINES,  AND  TO 
     KEEP SAFE DURING MOONLIT NIGHTS      
                                          
           BRONZE IS ALSO GOOD.           
                                          
           IRON IS A NOOB METAL