THE   GOLDEN        
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT ALL  BEGAN  A  THOUSAND  YEARS AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED  FROM  A TAVERN  AFTER A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP,  WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN  THE  DAY  SHE SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE SHE  SOLD HER WARES,  AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW YEARS,  MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE  CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE  OLD TAVERN HAD  THEIR MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME A  LITTLE  TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE   TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH  LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH  THERE  CAME A 
 TIME WHEN  THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE  HID  THE CART, AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A  MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.  HE   WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND  AS  SUCH HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA TO  FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T  ALL THAT  OF A COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME  RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY.  HOWEVER HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A  HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING.  THE TAVERN DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY  HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS IN  THE PROCESS  OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY  AT EVERYONE FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS   FOOD,   HE    VOWED    TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH  ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH  HOLDS NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR COW  MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH  FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE  GOT SCAMMED OUT OF  THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT,  AND QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!