dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for   a  second 
 everything is  completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all  over my vision,  pressing in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize  i can't hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless, but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature.  turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a  prick  on the  nose, that's 
 what  these are. like you  do with a cat 
 who  comes to close to  your sandwich...