dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i   wake  suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to  piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all  over my vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can  feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in my mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i realize  i  can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such is my  nature. turning  the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense  though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you  wander too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick on the nose,  that's 
 what these are. like you do  with  a cat 
 who  comes to close to  your sandwich...