dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything  is  completely calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then   the  fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my  vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i  can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences i can't hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my  mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i realize  i  can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to  crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature. turning  the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but  time does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you wander too  far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick on the nose,  that's 
 what these are.  like you do with a  cat 
 who comes  to close  to your sandwich...