dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to  piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my  vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i can  feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't hide  from, 
 forcefully  transcribed  in my mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then i  realize i  can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must try  to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief,  such is  my nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of  this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if  you wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a  prick on  the nose,  that's 
 what these are. like you do with  a  cat 
 who comes to close to  your  sandwich...