RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
......@... ======================================== .@..@.@@@.
.......@.. ..@...@.@@
@.......@. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @..@....@@
@@.......@ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. .@..@...@.
@@@....... ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ..@..@....
@.@@...... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ...@..@...
..@@@..... ....@..@..
..@.@@.... MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @....@..@.
....@@@... THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH .@....@..@
@...@.@@.. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ..@....@..
.@....@@@. THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM @..@....@.
..@...@.@@ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @@..@....@
@..@....@@ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @@@..@....
.@..@...@. COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) @.@@..@...
..@..@.... ..@@@..@..
...@..@... IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ..@.@@..@.
....@..@.. CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR @...@@@..@
@....@..@. COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE @@..@.@@..
.@....@..@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .@@...@@@.
..@....@.. OPERATION. .@@@..@.@@
@..@....@. .@.@@...@@
@@..@....@ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ...@@@..@.
@@@..@.... NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ...@.@@...
@.@@..@... .....@@@..
..@@@..@.. ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== @....@.@@.
..@.@@..@. ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== @@.....@@@
@...@@@..@ .@@....@.@
@@..@.@@.. ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== .@@@.....@
.@@...@@@. ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== .@.@@....@
.@@@..@.@@ ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== ...@@@....
.@.@@...@@ ==# AND AT EASE #== ...@.@@...
...@@@..@. .....@@@..
...@.@@... ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== .....@.@@.
.....@@@.. ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== .......@@@
@....@.@@. ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== @......@.@
@@.....@@@ @@.......@
.@@....@.@ ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== @@@......@
.@@@.....@ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== @.@@......
.@.@@....@ ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== ..@@@.....
...@@@.... ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== ..@.@@....
...@.@@... ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== ....@@@...
.....@@@.. @...@.@@..
.....@.@@. ======================================== .@....@@@.
:::=: : ==: : =: :=
: :: : : . :. .
. . % .
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.