RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
##¨¨#¨¨#¨¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨#¨¨¨##¨¨¨
###¨¨#¨¨#¨ ¨¨#¨¨###¨¨
#¨##¨¨#¨¨# THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¨¨#¨#¨##¨
¨¨###¨¨#¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨##¨
¨¨#¨##¨¨#¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL #¨¨¨¨¨¨###
#¨¨¨###¨¨# CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨#¨¨¨¨¨#¨#
##¨¨#¨##¨¨ ¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨¨#
¨##¨¨¨###¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨#
¨###¨¨#¨## THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨
¨#¨##¨¨¨## IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO #¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨###¨¨#¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨
¨¨¨#¨##¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨###¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE #¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨
¨¨¨¨¨#¨##¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨#¨¨#¨¨¨¨#
#¨¨¨¨¨¨### ¨¨#¨¨#¨¨¨¨
¨#¨¨¨¨¨#¨# IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨¨#¨¨#¨¨¨
¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨¨# CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨¨¨#¨¨#¨¨
¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨# COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE #¨¨¨¨#¨¨#¨
¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨#
#¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨ OPERATION. ¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨
¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨ ¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨
¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY #¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨#
#¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨#¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨
¨#¨¨#¨¨¨¨# ¨¨#¨¨¨#¨¨¨
¨¨#¨¨#¨¨¨¨ ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ¨¨¨#¨¨¨#¨¨
¨¨¨#¨¨#¨¨¨ ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« ¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨#¨
¨¨¨¨#¨¨#¨¨ #¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨#
#¨¨¨¨#¨¨#¨ ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« ##¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨
¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨# ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« ¨##¨¨¨¨#¨¨
¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨ ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« ¨###¨¨¨¨#¨
¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨ ««# AND AT EASE #«« ¨#¨##¨¨¨¨#
#¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨# ¨¨¨###¨¨¨¨
¨#¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨ ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ¨¨¨#¨##¨¨¨
¨¨#¨¨¨#¨¨¨ ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ¨¨¨¨¨###¨¨
¨¨¨#¨¨¨#¨¨ ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« ¨¨¨¨¨#¨##¨
¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨#¨ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨###
#¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨# ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨#
##¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨ ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨#
¨##¨¨¨¨#¨¨ ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨#
¨###¨¨¨¨#¨ ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨#¨##¨¨¨¨# ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨###¨¨¨¨ #¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨#¨##¨¨¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨#¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.