RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
#......... ======================================== ....#..#..
..######## .##.......
#..####### THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ....######
....#####. THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. .##..#####
.##..###.. ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ......###.
......#... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. #####..#..
#####...## ####.....#
####..#... MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ###..###..
.##.....## THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ##....#...
....###..# IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO #..##...##
.##..#.... THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ......#...
.......##. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE #####...##
.#####.... DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE .###..#...
..###..##. COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ..#.....##
...#...... #...###...
##...##### IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ..#..#..##
#..#..#### CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR #........#
.......### COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ..######..
######..## WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ...####..#
#####....# OPERATION. ##..##....
.###..##.. #......##.
..#......# SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ..####....
#...####.. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: #..##..###
..#..##... ........##
........## ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== .######...
#######..# ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ..####..##
######.... ...##....#
#####..### ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== ##....##..
.###....## ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== ...##.....
..#..##..# ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== ##....####
.......... ==# AND AT EASE #== #..##..##.
#########. ..........
.#######.. ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== .########.
..#####..# ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== ..######..
#..###.... ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== ...####..#
....#..### ##..##....
###.....## ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== #......###
##..###..# ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== ..####..##
#....#.... ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== ...##....#
..##...### ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== ##....##..
#....#..## ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== #..##....#
..##...... ......##..
#....##### ======================================== #####....#
^^^=^ ^ ==^ ^ =^ ^=
^ ^^ ^ ^ . ^. .
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.