RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨§§¨§¨¨§¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨§¨§§§§¨¨¨
§¨§§§¨§§¨¨                                          §§§¨¨¨§¨¨¨
§§¨¨§§¨§¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A  VERY  COMMON  TOOL IN ¨¨§¨¨§§¨¨§
¨§¨§¨§§§¨§ THE  FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨§§¨§¨§¨§¨
§§§§§¨¨§§¨ ITS JOB IS TO  DO VAST AMOUNTS OF  SMALL §¨§§§§§§§¨
¨¨¨¨§¨§¨§§ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT  AMOUNT OF TIME. §§¨¨¨¨¨¨§§
¨¨¨§§§§§¨§                                          ¨§¨¨¨¨¨§¨§
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§§§ MOST  WORK ON THE  PRINCIPLES  OF POSING §§¨¨¨¨§§§§
¨§§¨¨¨§¨¨§ THE  PROBLEM  ON  A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨§¨¨¨§¨¨¨§
§¨§¨¨§§¨§¨ IS  THEN  FOLDED OUT  OF  CAUSALITY,  SO §§¨¨§§¨¨§§
§§§¨§¨§§§¨ THAT   DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE  THE  PROBLEM ¨§¨§¨§¨§¨¨
¨¨§§§§¨¨§¨    WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE   §§§§§§§§¨§
¨§¨¨¨§¨§§§ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§§§
§§¨¨§§§¨¨§          COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)         ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§
¨§¨§¨¨§¨§§                                          ¨¨¨¨¨§§¨§¨
§§§§¨§§§¨¨   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   ¨¨¨¨§¨§§§¨
¨¨¨§§¨¨§¨¨ CLERKS TO  PRAY  TO THE  "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨¨§§§¨¨§§
¨¨§¨§¨§§¨¨ COMPUTER, OR  TO  THE DAEMONS DOING  THE ¨¨§¨¨§¨§¨§
¨§§§§§¨§¨§ WORK,  FOR  A  QUICK   AND   FAULT  FREE ¨§§¨§§§§§§
§¨¨¨¨§§§§¨                OPERATION.                §¨§§¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨§¨¨¨§§                                          §§¨§¨¨¨¨§¨
§¨¨§§¨¨§¨¨      SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY       ¨§§§¨¨¨§§§
§¨§¨§¨§§¨¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    §¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨
§§§§§§¨§¨§                                          §¨§§¨§§¨¨§
¨¨¨¨¨§§§§§      »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»»      §§¨§§¨§¨§¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨        »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»»        ¨§§¨§§§§§¨
¨¨¨§§¨¨¨¨§                                          §¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨§¨§¨¨¨§§     »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»»     §§¨§¨¨¨§§¨
¨§§§§¨¨§¨¨    »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»»    ¨§§§¨¨§¨§¨
§¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨     »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»»     §¨¨§¨§§§§¨
§¨¨§§§¨§¨§           »»# AND AT EASE #»»            §¨§§§¨¨¨§§
§¨§¨¨§§§§¨                                          §§¨¨§¨¨§¨¨
§§§¨§¨¨¨§§     »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»»     ¨§¨§§¨§§¨§
¨¨§§§¨¨§¨§     »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»»     §§§¨§§¨§§¨
¨§¨¨§¨§§§¨   »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»»   ¨¨§§¨§§¨§¨
§§¨§§§¨¨§¨                                          ¨§¨§§¨§§§¨
¨§§¨¨§¨§§§   »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»»    §§§¨§§¨¨§§
§¨§¨§§§¨¨§     »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»»    ¨¨§§¨§¨§¨§
§§§§¨¨§¨§¨    »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»»     ¨§¨§§§§§§¨
¨¨¨§¨§§§§§     »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»»      §§§¨¨¨¨¨§§
¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨§       »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»»        ¨¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§
¨§¨¨§¨¨¨§¨                                          ¨§§¨¨¨§§§§
§§¨§§¨¨§§§ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» §¨§¨¨§¨¨¨§
           ~~~»~      ~   »»~   ~           »~   ~»           
           ~     ~~     ~     ~     ¨     ~¨      ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  $      ¨           
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           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE    A     KIND     OF    PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU   MAKE   A    CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,   AND    USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.  AS   IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK   FOR  A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS    BUGS,    LOTS    OF   IT.