RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¨@¨@¨@¨@ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« @@¨¨¨@¨¨¨@
@¨¨@@@@@@@ @¨@¨¨@@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @@@@¨@¨@¨@
@@@@@¨¨¨¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. @¨¨¨@@@@@@
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨@¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨@@¨@@¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨@¨¨ @@¨@@¨@¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@@@¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @¨@@¨@@@¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨@ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH @@@¨@@¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨@@¨@¨@@
@¨¨¨¨@¨@¨@ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨¨@¨@@@@¨
@@¨¨¨@@@@@ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @¨¨@@@¨¨¨@
¨¨@¨¨@¨¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @@¨@¨¨@¨¨@
@¨@@¨@@¨¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨@@@¨@@¨@
¨@@¨@@¨@¨¨ ¨¨@¨¨@@¨@@
@@¨@@¨@@@¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND @¨@@¨@¨@@¨
@¨@@¨@@¨¨@ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨@@¨@@@@¨@
¨@@¨@@¨@¨@ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨@¨@@¨¨¨@@
@@¨@@¨@@@@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨@@@¨@¨¨@¨
@¨@@¨@@¨¨¨ OPERATION. @@¨¨@@@¨@@
¨@@¨@@¨@¨¨ @¨@¨@¨¨@@¨
¨@¨@@¨@@@¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY @@@@@@¨@¨@
@@@@¨@@¨¨@ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: @¨¨¨¨¨@@@@
¨¨¨¨@@¨@¨@ @@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨@¨@@@@ ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ¨¨@¨¨¨@@¨¨
¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨¨ ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« @¨@@¨¨@¨@¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨ ¨@@¨@¨@@@@
@¨¨¨@@¨@@¨ ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« ¨@¨@@@@¨¨¨
@@¨¨@¨@@¨@ ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« ¨@@@¨¨¨@¨¨
@¨@¨@@@¨@@ ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« @@¨¨@¨¨@@¨
@@@@@¨¨@@¨ ««# AND AT EASE #«« @¨@¨@@¨@¨@
¨¨¨¨¨@¨@¨@ ¨@@@@¨@@@@
@¨¨¨¨@@@@@ ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ¨@¨¨¨@@¨¨¨
@@¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ¨@@¨¨@¨@¨¨
@¨@¨¨@@¨¨¨ ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« ¨@¨@¨@@@@¨
@@@@¨@¨@¨¨ ¨@@@@@¨¨¨@
¨¨¨¨@@@@@¨ ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« ¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨@
@¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨@ ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« ¨@@¨¨¨@@¨@
¨@¨¨@@¨¨¨@ ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« @@¨@¨¨@¨@@
@@@¨@¨@¨¨@ ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ¨¨@@@¨@@@¨
@¨¨@@@@@¨@ ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« ¨¨@¨¨@@¨¨@
¨@¨@¨¨¨¨@@ @¨@@¨@¨@¨@
@@@@@¨¨¨@¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« @@@¨@@@@@@
:::«: : ««: : «: :«
: :: : : ¨ :¨ ¨
¨ ¨ % ¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.