dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything is completely calm  and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and  i   feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision, pressing  in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences i  can't hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in  my mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander too  far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick on  the nose, that's 
 what these are.  like you do with  a cat 
 who  comes to close to  your sandwich...