dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything is completely  calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over my vision, pressing  in,  being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in my  mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize  i can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try to 
 escape. to  crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such is  my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you  wander too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a prick on the  nose,  that's 
 what  these are. like you do with a  cat 
 who  comes to close to  your sandwich...