dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing  in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language,  sentences i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize  i  can't hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature. turning  the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if  you  wander too far, 
 i  guess? i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick on the  nose,  that's 
 what these are.  like you  do with a cat 
 who comes to close  to your  sandwich...