dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i   wake  suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is completely  calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and  i   feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can  feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i  realize i  can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to  crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature. turning  the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting... but  time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of  this happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my  eyes are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a  prick on the  nose, that's 
 what these are.  like  you do with a cat 
 who comes  to close to your  sandwich...