THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN  A  THOUSAND YEARS AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM  A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP,  WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
         BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.        
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES,  OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN THE  DAY SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE SHE SOLD  HER  WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS  FOOD CART 
 HAD  A   REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE TALKED ABOUT  THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER,  SHE BECAME A  LITTLE TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT   ON  HER 
 TRAIL, SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION.  SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON ENOUGH  THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR  HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE  HID THE CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A  MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND   THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH  HE OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF  A  COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME  RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A  HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T  CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED  TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN  THE PROCESS OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR  NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW  HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY  HE ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR COW  MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO  HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED OUT  OF THE  CART BY 
 A MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!