dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to  piece   together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i  can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i realize  i  can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings  are entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such is my nature.  turning  the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything of  this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can  happen if you wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a  prick  on the nose,  that's 
 what  these are. like you  do with a cat 
 who comes  to close to  your sandwich...