dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for  a   second 
 everything  is completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision,  pressing in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in my  mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief,  such is my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting... but  time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you wander  too  far, 
 i  guess? i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a  prick on  the nose,  that's 
 what these are. like  you do with a  cat 
 who comes to  close to  your sandwich...