RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨¨¨##¨#¨¨¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨¨¨#¨¨#¨#¨
¨¨#¨###¨¨¨                                          ¨¨##¨####¨
¨###¨¨#¨¨# THE  COMPUTER IS A VERY  COMMON  TOOL IN ¨#¨##¨¨¨#¨
#¨¨#¨##¨## THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN  NOW. ###¨#¨¨##¨
#¨###¨##¨# ITS JOB IS  TO  DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨###¨#¨##
##¨¨##¨##¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT  OF TIME. ¨#¨¨####¨¨
¨#¨#¨##¨##                                          ##¨#¨¨¨#¨#
#####¨##¨# MOST WORK ON  THE PRINCIPLES  OF  POSING ¨###¨¨####
¨¨¨¨##¨### THE  PROBLEM ON A  HILBERT  PLANE, WHICH #¨¨#¨#¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨#¨##¨¨¨ IS  THEN  FOLDED  OUT OF  CAUSALITY,  SO #¨####¨¨¨¨
¨¨###¨#¨¨¨ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE  THE   PROBLEM ##¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨
¨#¨¨###¨¨#    WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE   ¨#¨¨##¨¨¨¨
##¨#¨¨#¨#¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ##¨#¨#¨¨¨¨
¨###¨#####         COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)          ¨#####¨¨¨#
#¨¨##¨¨¨¨¨                                          #¨¨¨¨#¨¨##
#¨#¨#¨¨¨¨#   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   #¨¨¨##¨#¨¨
#####¨¨¨#¨ CLERKS TO  PRAY TO  THE "GODS"  OF THEIR #¨¨#¨###¨#
¨¨¨¨#¨¨##¨ COMPUTER,  OR  TO  THE DAEMONS DOING THE #¨###¨¨##¨
¨¨¨##¨#¨#¨ WORK,   FOR  A  QUICK   AND  FAULT  FREE ##¨¨#¨#¨#¨
¨¨#¨######                OPERATION.                ¨#¨######¨
¨###¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ###¨¨¨¨¨#¨
#¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨#      SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY       ¨¨#¨¨¨¨##¨
#¨##¨¨¨¨##    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    ¨##¨¨¨#¨##
##¨#¨¨¨#¨#                                          #¨#¨¨###¨¨
¨###¨¨####      ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #««      ###¨#¨¨#¨#
#¨¨#¨#¨¨¨#        ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #««        ¨¨###¨####
#¨####¨¨#¨                                          ¨#¨¨##¨¨¨¨
##¨¨¨#¨###     ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #««     ##¨#¨#¨¨¨#
¨#¨¨###¨¨¨    ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #««    ¨#####¨¨#¨
##¨#¨¨#¨¨¨     ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #««     #¨¨¨¨#¨##¨
¨###¨##¨¨¨            ««# AND AT EASE #««           #¨¨¨###¨##
#¨¨##¨#¨¨¨                                          #¨¨#¨¨##¨#
#¨#¨###¨¨#     ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #««     #¨##¨#¨##¨
####¨¨#¨#¨     ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #««     ##¨####¨##
¨¨¨#¨#####   ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #««   ¨##¨¨¨##¨¨
¨¨###¨¨¨¨¨                                          #¨#¨¨#¨#¨¨
¨#¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨   ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #««    ###¨####¨¨
##¨##¨¨¨¨#     ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #««    ¨¨##¨¨¨#¨¨
¨##¨#¨¨¨##    ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #««     ¨#¨#¨¨##¨#
#¨###¨¨#¨#      ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #««     ####¨#¨###
##¨¨#¨###¨       ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #««        ¨¨¨####¨¨¨
¨#¨###¨¨#¨                                          ¨¨#¨¨¨#¨¨#
###¨¨#¨##¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨##¨¨##¨##
           ~~~«~     ~   ««~   ~            «~   ~«           
           ~     ~~      ~     ~     ¨     ~¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  †      ¨           
                               ¨                              
                                                              
                                                              
           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE     A    KIND     OF    PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU   MAKE    A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.   AS  IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK  FOR  A  HANDFUL  OF   BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS    BUGS,    LOTS    OF   IT.