RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
....&.&&&& ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ &.....&&.&
&...&&&... .&....&.&&
.&..&..&.. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &&&...&&&.
.&&.&&.&&. THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &..&..&..&
&&.&&.&&.& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&.&&.&&.&
..&&.&&.&& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ..&&.&&.&&
&.&.&&.&&. &.&.&&.&&.
&&&&&.&&.& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING .&&&&.&&.&
.....&&.&& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH .&...&&.&&
&....&.&&. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &&&..&.&&.
&&...&&&.& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ...&.&&&.&
..&..&..&& WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE &..&&&..&&
&.&&.&&.&. DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &&.&..&.&.
&&&.&&.&&& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) &.&&&.&&&&
...&&.&&.. &&&..&&...
...&.&&.&. IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &..&.&.&..
...&&&.&&& CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &&.&&&&&&.
...&..&&.. COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ..&&.....&
&..&&.&.&. WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ..&.&....&
.&.&.&&&&& OPERATION. ..&&&&...&
&&&&&&.... &.&...&..&
......&... SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &&&&..&&.&
&.....&&.. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ....&.&.&&
.&....&.&. &...&&&&&.
.&&...&&&& ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ .&..&....&
&&.&..&... ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ .&&.&&...&
..&&&.&&.. &&.&&.&..&
&.&..&&.&. ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ &.&&.&&&.&
.&&&.&.&&& ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ &&&.&&..&&
&&..&&&&.. ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ &..&&.&.&.
&.&.&...&. ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ &&.&.&&&&&
.&&&&&..&& ..&&&&....
.&....&.&. ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ..&...&...
.&&...&&&& ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ ..&&..&&..
.&.&..&... ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ ..&.&.&.&.
.&&&&.&&.. &.&&&&&&&&
&&...&&.&. ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ .&&.......
&.&..&.&&& ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ &&.&......
&&&&.&&&.. ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ &.&&&.....
&...&&..&. ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ &&&..&....
&&..&.&.&& ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ &..&.&&...
&.&.&&&&&. &&.&&&.&..
&&&&&....& ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ..&&..&&&.
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.