RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¨¤¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¤ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨
¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¤¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¤
¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¤ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¤
¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¤ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¤¨
¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤ ¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¨
¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨
¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¨
¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¤¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¤ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¤ ¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¤¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨ OPERATION. ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤
¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¨ ¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤
¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨
¤¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨
¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨ ¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¨¨ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨ ¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» ¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨
¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤
¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨ ¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤
¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» ¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨
¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¨
¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¨ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨ ¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¤ ¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.