RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
#,,,,##,,, ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ,,,,##,,,,
,,##,,,,#, ###,,,,##,
#,,,,##,,, THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ,#,,##,,,,
,,##,,,,## THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ,,,,,,,##,
#,,,,##,,# ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ######,,,,
,,##,,,,,, CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. #####,,##,
#,,,,####, ####,,,,,,
,,##,,##,, MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ,##,,####,
#,,,,,,,,# THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ,,,,,,##,,
,,######,, IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO #####,,,,,
#,,####,,, THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ####,,####
,,,,##,,## WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ,##,,,,###
,##,,,,,,, DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ,,,,##,,#,
,,,,###### COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ###,,,,,,,
###,,##### ##,,######
##,,,,#### IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND #,,,,#####
#,,##,,##, CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ,,##,,####
,,,,,,,,,, COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE #,,,,,,###
,########, WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ,,####,,#,
,,######,, OPERATION. ,,,##,,,,,
#,,####,,, ##,,,,####
,,,,##,,## SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ,,,##,,###
,##,,,,,,# NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ##,,,,,,#,
,,,,####,, #,,####,,,
###,,##,,# ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ,,,,##,,##
##,,,,,,,, ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ###,,,,,,#
#,,######, ##,,####,,
,,,,####,, ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ #,,,,##,,,
###,,##,,# ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ ,,##,,,,##
##,,,,,,,, ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ ,,,,,##,,#
#,,####### ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ####,,,,,,
,,,,###### ,##,,####,
###,,##### ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ,,,,,,##,,
,#,,,,#### ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ ,####,,,,,
,,,##,,### ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ ,,##,,####
,#,,,,,,#, ,,,,,,,##,
,,,####,,, ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ ######,,,,
##,,##,,#, ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ #####,,###
#,,,,,,,,, ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ ####,,,,##
,,######## ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ,##,,##,,#
,,,####### ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ,,,,,,,,,,
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.