RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨######¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ##¨#¨####¨
¨¨#¨¨¨¨¨#¨ ¨¨####¨¨¨#
#¨##¨¨¨¨## THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN #¨#¨¨¨#¨¨#
¨##¨#¨¨¨#¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨###¨¨##¨#
##¨###¨¨## ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ##¨¨#¨#¨##
¨¨##¨¨#¨#¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨#¨#####¨
¨¨#¨#¨#### ¨¨###¨¨¨¨#
#¨#####¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING #¨#¨¨#¨¨¨#
¨##¨¨¨¨#¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ####¨##¨¨#
##¨#¨¨¨##¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨¨##¨#¨#
¨¨###¨¨#¨# THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM #¨¨¨#¨####
#¨#¨¨#¨### WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ##¨¨###¨¨¨
####¨###¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¨#¨#¨¨#¨¨
#¨¨¨##¨¨#¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨####¨##¨
##¨¨#¨#¨## ¨¨#¨¨¨##¨#
¨¨#¨#####¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨##¨¨#¨##
#¨###¨¨¨¨# CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¨#¨#¨###¨
###¨¨#¨¨¨# COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE #¨#####¨¨#
¨¨¨#¨##¨¨# WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ###¨¨¨¨#¨#
#¨¨###¨#¨# OPERATION. ¨¨¨#¨¨¨###
¨#¨#¨¨#### ¨¨¨##¨¨#¨¨
¨####¨#¨¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨¨#¨#¨##¨
¨#¨¨¨###¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: #¨¨#####¨#
###¨¨#¨¨#¨ ##¨#¨¨¨¨##
¨¨¨#¨##¨## ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ¨¨###¨¨¨#¨
¨¨¨###¨##¨ ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ #¨#¨¨#¨¨##
#¨¨#¨¨##¨# ####¨##¨#¨
##¨##¨#¨## ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ #¨¨¨##¨###
¨¨##¨####¨ ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ ##¨¨#¨##¨¨
¨¨#¨##¨¨¨# ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ #¨#¨###¨#¨
¨¨###¨#¨¨# ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ¨####¨¨###
#¨#¨¨###¨# ¨#¨¨¨#¨#¨¨
####¨#¨¨## ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ¨##¨¨####¨
#¨¨¨###¨#¨ ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ ##¨#¨#¨¨¨#
¨#¨¨#¨¨### ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ ¨¨#####¨¨#
###¨##¨#¨¨ ¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨#
¨¨¨##¨###¨ ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ #¨##¨¨¨###
#¨¨#¨##¨¨# ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ###¨#¨¨#¨¨
##¨###¨#¨# ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ #¨¨###¨##¨
#¨##¨¨#### ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ¨#¨#¨¨##¨#
¨##¨#¨#¨¨¨ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ #####¨#¨##
##¨#####¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨####¨
#¨##¨¨¨¨#¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ #¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨#
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.