RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
&¨¨&¨&¨¨&¨ ======================================== ¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨& &¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨
¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨
¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨
¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨
¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨
¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨&¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨
¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨
¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨&¨ ¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨&¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨&¨¨¨&¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨ OPERATION. ¨¨¨&¨¨¨&¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨& &¨¨¨&¨¨¨&¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &&¨¨¨&¨¨¨&
&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: &&&¨¨¨&¨¨¨
¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ &¨&&¨¨¨&¨¨
¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== ¨¨&&&¨¨¨&¨
¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨ ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== ¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨&
&¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨
¨&¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨ ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== ¨¨¨¨&¨&&¨¨
¨¨&¨¨¨&¨¨¨ ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== &¨¨¨¨¨&&&¨
¨¨¨&¨¨¨&¨¨ ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== &&¨¨¨¨&¨&&
&¨¨¨&¨¨¨&¨ ==# AND AT EASE #== ¨&&¨¨¨¨¨&&
&&¨¨¨&¨¨¨& ¨&&&¨¨¨¨&¨
&&&¨¨¨&¨¨¨ ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== ¨&¨&&¨¨¨¨¨
&¨&&¨¨¨&¨¨ ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== ¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨¨
¨¨&&&¨¨¨&¨ ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== ¨¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨
¨¨&¨&&¨¨¨& ¨¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨
¨¨¨¨&&&¨¨¨ ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== ¨¨¨¨¨&¨&&¨
¨¨¨¨&¨&&¨¨ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&&&
&¨¨¨¨¨&&&¨ ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&¨&
&&¨¨¨¨&¨&& ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== &¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&
¨&&¨¨¨¨¨&& ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== ¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨&
¨&&&¨¨¨¨&¨ ¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨&¨&&¨¨¨¨¨ ======================================== ¨¨¨&¨¨¨¨¨¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.