RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
.........@ ======================================== @@.....@@@
@........@ @@@....@.@
@@.......@ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @.@@.....@
.@@....... THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ..@@@....@
.@@@...... ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ..@.@@....
.@.@@..... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. @...@@@...
...@@@.... @@..@.@@..
...@.@@... MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING .@@...@@@.
.....@@@.. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH .@@@..@.@@
@....@.@@. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO .@.@@...@@
@@.....@@@ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ...@@@..@.
@@@....@.@ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @..@.@@...
@.@@.....@ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE @@...@@@..
..@@@....@ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) @@@..@.@@.
..@.@@.... @.@@...@@@
@...@@@... IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ..@@@..@.@
@@..@.@@.. CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ..@.@@...@
.@@...@@@. COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ....@@@..@
.@@@..@.@@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE @...@.@@..
.@.@@...@@ OPERATION. @@....@@@.
...@@@..@. .@@...@.@@
@..@.@@... SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY .@@@....@@
@@...@@@.. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: .@.@@...@.
@@@..@.@@. ...@@@....
@.@@...@@@ ==# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #== @..@.@@...
..@@@..@.@ ==# FOR QUIET AND CALM #== @@...@@@..
..@.@@...@ @@@..@.@@.
....@@@..@ ==# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #== @.@@...@@@
@...@.@@.. ==# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #== ..@@@..@.@
@@....@@@. ==# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #== ..@.@@...@
.@@...@.@@ ==# AND AT EASE #== ....@@@..@
.@@@....@@ @...@.@@..
.@.@@...@. ==# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #== .@....@@@.
...@@@.... ==# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #== ..@...@.@@
@..@.@@... ==# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #== @..@....@@
@@...@@@.. .@..@...@.
@@@..@.@@. ==# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #== ..@..@....
@.@@...@@@ ==# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #== ...@..@...
..@@@..@.@ ==# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #== ....@..@..
..@.@@...@ ==# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #== @....@..@.
....@@@..@ ==# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #== .@....@..@
@...@.@@.. ..@....@..
.@....@@@. ======================================== @..@....@.
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.