RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨#¨¨###¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨#####¨¨#
#¨##¨#¨¨#¨ #¨#¨¨¨¨#¨#
¨##¨###¨## THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ####¨¨¨###
##¨##¨¨##¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. #¨¨¨#¨¨#¨¨
#¨##¨#¨#¨# ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨#¨¨##¨##¨
###¨###### CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ###¨#¨##¨#
¨¨¨##¨¨¨¨¨ #¨¨####¨##
#¨¨#¨#¨¨¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ##¨#¨¨¨##¨
##¨####¨¨¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH #¨###¨¨#¨#
¨¨##¨¨¨#¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨##¨¨#¨###
#¨#¨#¨¨##¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨#¨#¨###¨¨
######¨#¨# WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ######¨¨#¨
#¨¨¨¨¨#### DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¨¨¨¨¨#¨##
¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) #¨¨¨¨¨###¨
¨##¨¨¨##¨¨ ¨#¨¨¨¨#¨¨#
##¨#¨¨#¨#¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨##¨¨¨##¨#
¨¨###¨#### CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ##¨#¨¨#¨##
#¨#¨¨##¨¨¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨###¨###¨
####¨#¨#¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE #¨#¨¨##¨¨#
¨¨¨¨#####¨ OPERATION. ¨###¨#¨#¨#
#¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨# ¨#¨¨######
¨#¨¨##¨¨¨# SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ###¨#¨¨¨¨¨
¨##¨#¨#¨¨# NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨¨###¨¨¨¨
¨#¨#####¨# ¨¨¨#¨¨#¨¨¨
¨###¨¨¨¨## »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¨¨¨##¨##¨¨
¨#¨¨#¨¨¨#¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» #¨¨#¨##¨#¨
¨##¨##¨¨## ¨#¨###¨###
##¨##¨#¨#¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ####¨¨##¨¨
#¨##¨##### »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» #¨¨¨#¨#¨#¨
###¨##¨¨¨¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ¨#¨¨######
¨¨¨##¨#¨¨¨ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¨##¨#¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨#¨###¨¨ ¨#¨###¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨###¨¨#¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» ¨###¨¨#¨¨¨
¨¨¨#¨¨#¨## »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ##¨¨#¨##¨¨
¨¨¨##¨###¨ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨¨#¨###¨#¨
¨¨¨#¨##¨¨# #¨###¨¨###
#¨¨###¨#¨# »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ###¨¨#¨#¨¨
##¨#¨¨#### »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨¨¨#¨####¨
#¨###¨#¨¨¨ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» #¨¨###¨¨¨#
¨##¨¨###¨¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ##¨#¨¨#¨¨#
##¨#¨#¨¨#¨ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» #¨###¨##¨#
¨¨#####¨## ###¨¨##¨##
#¨#¨¨¨¨##¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨#¨#¨##¨
:::»: : »»: : »: :»
: :: : : ¨ :¨ ¨
¨ ¨ = ¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.