party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off, shower  curtains  drawn. floor full 
 of dirty clothes,  of garbage,  and as i 
 start to unzip  my pants,  she steps out 
 of   the  shower   and  pushes   me   to 
 theground. 
  
 i  wish   to   be   contacted  by   some 
 [god,  alien]  who  would bestow upon me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything right forever.  what i  don't 
 know  is  that   this  happens  multiple 
 times  per  second - they  ask me: "when 
 you  said the  world egg was your  ideal 
 body  type, did  you mean it"? i  answer 
 "not really, but i can act like  it  for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory  of the  encounter and moved  on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom