party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off, shower curtains  drawn. floor  full 
 of dirty clothes,  of garbage, and as  i 
 start to unzip my pants,  she  steps out 
 of   the   shower   and  pushes   me  to 
 theground. 
  
 i  wish   to   be  contacted   by   some 
 [god, alien] who would  bestow  upon  me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything right  forever. what i  don't 
 know  is  that  this   happens  multiple 
 times  per second - they  ask  me: "when 
 you said  the world egg  was  your ideal 
 body type, did  you mean it"?  i  answer 
 "not  really, but i can act like it  for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory  of  the encounter and moved  on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom