LIFE                
                                    
                                    
                                          
     A MULTITUDE OF DEFINITIONS     
       DOES   NOT   HELP.   WE        
      CAN     SAY     "LIFE     IS      
         WHAT   WE   ARE,   AND       
       WHAT  THINGS  LIKE  US       
       ARE",   BUT    THEN   WE       
     MUST    ALSO    DEFINE    WHAT     
     "THINGS  LIKE  US"  ACTUALLY     
      ENTAILS,  HOW IT SHOULD       
       BE   MEASURED,   WHO   OR      
     WHAT    IS    THE     ARBITER,     
      AND  SO   INSTEAD   THERE       
          IS   THIS    INTERNATIONALLY 
 SANCTIONED      LIST                  
           OF CRITERIA          
                                          
 - LIFE MUST PRODUCE OR CONSUME MILK      
 - LIFE MUST HAVE A BEGINNING AND AN END  
 - LIFE CAN HAVE DREAMS AND CAN INTERACT  
 - LIFE CAN STEAL                         
 - LIFE CAN BE CURSED