FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH (THE  PLANET  WHERE I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT OF US  HAVE  ANTENNAS ON  OUR HOUSES 
 OR   BALCONIES,   WE  HAVE  BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO ORBIT),  WE'VE  BUILT LARGE AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH  A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED  ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT   IN   THE  GALAXY,   AND  OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN  THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS  PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND  THE SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF  THE GALAXY  AT VELOCITY  AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS  MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND THE  GALAXY. AND WE AS A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE ALL  THIS, DESPITE  ALL  OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO PROGRAMMES  OUT IN  FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT THE  SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT  IS OUR 
  MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!), 
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
    FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS   
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST OPPONENTS  TO  INTELLIGENT LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE SAY  IT'S BECAUSE YOU  NEED 
 A CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY  FROM THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY   ISN'T  THAT   KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE  HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT  WE'RE DOING (AND  IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M  GONNA GO SMOKE  MY  THIRD CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR AND  TRY  TO SNATCH SOME BEERS 
         FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING