dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i   wake  suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is completely  calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start  to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences  i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed  in my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then i  realize  i can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such is  my  nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my  eyes are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander too  far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick  on the  nose, that's 
 what these  are. like you do  with a cat 
 who  comes to close to your  sandwich...