FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH (THE  PLANET WHERE  I  LIVE) A 
 LOT OF US  HAVE  ANTENNAS ON  OUR HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,  WE  HAVE   BUILT   LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER BANDWITH,  WE HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
   SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM    
 INTO ORBIT),  WE'VE BUILT LARGE  AS FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY  BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH A 
          DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.         
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT OUR  POSITION IN THE 
     SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS      
 PLACEMENT  IN   THE  GALAXY,   AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL  CLUSTER, 
 AND  OUR  LOCAL CLUSTERS PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND  THE SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER OF THE  GALAXY  AT  VELOCITY  AND 
 THE  GALAXY  IS MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND  THE  GALAXY. AND WE AS A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE  ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES OUT IN  FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT THE SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT  IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO      ONE        HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST OPPONENTS  TO INTELLIGENT  LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE  SAY IT'S  BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A  CLASS ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE STAR (LIKE  THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY  ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING   THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT  WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA  WHAT WE'RE DOING  (AND IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA GO  SMOKE  MY  THIRD CIGARETTE 
 THIS  YEAR AND  TRY TO SNATCH SOME BEERS 
         FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING