dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely  calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and  i   feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i can't hide  from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in  my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize i  can't  hear  anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless, but  i  must  try  to 
 escape.  to crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my  nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine  a prick on the  nose, that's 
 what these are. like  you do with  a cat 
 who  comes to  close to your sandwich...