dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is completely calm  and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then   the  fear  hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all over  my  vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i can  feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in my  mind, and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize  i  can't hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic  in it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i feel  helpless,  but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to  crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such is my nature.  turning  the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i   don't    know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you wander  too far, 
 i  guess? i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a  prick on  the  nose, that's 
 what  these are. like  you do with a cat 
 who comes  to  close to your sandwich...