dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear   hits  me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision, pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in  my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize  i  can't hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody, almost  caustic  in  it's 
        particular microtonality.         
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless, but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief,  such  is my nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting...  but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense  though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a prick on  the  nose, that's 
 what these are. like you do with  a  cat 
 who  comes to  close to your sandwich...