RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
.&......&. «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« &&........
...&&&&... &..&&&&&&&
.&..&&..&. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ....&&&&&.
.......... THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &&&..&&&..
&&&&&&&&&& ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&....&..&
&&&&&&&&&& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &..&&.....
.&&&&&&&&. ......&&&.
..&&&&&&.. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&&&&..&..
&..&&&&..& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH .&&&.....&
....&&.... IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ..&..&&&..
&&&....&&& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &.....&..&
&&..&&..&& WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ..&&&.....
.........& DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &..&..&&&.
&&&&&&&&.. COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) .......&..
.&&&&&&... &&&&&&....
..&&&&..&& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &&&&&..&&&
...&&..... CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &&&&....&.
&&....&&&& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE &&&..&&...
...&&..&&& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE &&......&.
&&......&& OPERATION. &..&&&&...
...&&&&... ....&&..&.
&&..&&..&& SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY .&&.......
.......... NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ....&&&&&.
&&&&&&&&&& .&&..&&&..
.&&&&&&&&& ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ......&...
..&&&&&&&& ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« .&&&&...&&
...&&&&&&& ..&&..&...
&&..&&&&&& ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« ........&&
&....&&&&& ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« &&&&&&&..&
..&&..&&&. ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« &&&&&&....
&......&.. ««# AND AT EASE #«« .&&&&..&&&
..&&&&.... ..&&....&&
...&&..&&& ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« &....&&...
&&......&& ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ..&&....&&
&..&&&&..& ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« &....&&..&
....&&.... ..&&......
&&&....&&. ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« .....&&&&&
&&..&&.... ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« &&&&..&&&&
&......&&& ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« .&&....&&&
..&&&&..&& ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ....&&..&&
...&&..... ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« &&&.......
&&....&&&& &&..&&&&&&
&..&&..&&. «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« &....&&&&&
---«- - ««- - «- -«
- -- - - . -. .
. . * .
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.