RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@
¨@@@@@@@@¨ @@@@@@@¨¨¨
¨¨@@@@@@¨¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨@@@@@¨¨@@
¨¨¨@@@@¨¨@ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨
@@¨¨@@¨¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL @¨¨@¨¨@@@@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
¨¨@@@@¨¨¨¨ ¨@@@@@¨¨@@
¨¨¨@@¨¨@@@ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨@@@¨¨¨¨¨
@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH @¨¨@¨¨@@@@
@¨¨@@@@¨¨@ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM @@@@@@¨¨@@
¨@@¨¨¨¨@@¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE @@@@@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨@@@¨¨@@@@
¨@@¨¨¨¨@@@ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨@¨¨¨¨@@¨
¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@@ ¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨
@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND @@@¨¨¨¨@@@
@@¨¨@@@@@@ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR @@¨¨@@¨¨@@
@¨¨¨¨@@@@@ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE @¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@
¨¨@@¨¨@@@@ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨@@@@@@¨¨
@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@¨ OPERATION. ¨¨¨@@@@¨¨@
¨¨@@@@¨¨¨¨ @@¨¨@@¨¨¨¨
@¨¨@@¨¨@@@ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY @¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨@@@@¨¨@@
¨@@@@@@¨¨¨ ¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨@@@@¨¨@@ ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ @@¨¨¨¨@@@@
¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ ¨¨¨@@¨¨@@¨
@@¨¨¨¨@@@@ @@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨@@@ ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ ¨¨¨@@@@@@¨
@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@ ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ @@¨¨@@@@¨¨
¨¨¨@@@@¨¨¨ ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ @¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨
@@¨¨@@¨¨@@ ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ ¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@@
@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@ ¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@
¨¨@@@@@@¨¨ ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ @@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
@¨¨@@@@¨¨@ ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ ¨@@¨¨@@@@@
¨¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨ ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@@
¨@@¨¨¨¨@@@ @@@@@¨¨@@¨
¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@@ ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ @@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@ ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ @@@¨¨@@@@@
@@¨¨@@@@¨¨ ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ @@¨¨¨¨@@@@
@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@ ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ @¨¨@@¨¨@@@
¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@
¨¨¨¨¨@@@@@ @@@@@@@¨¨¨
@@@@¨¨@@@@ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ @@@@@@¨¨@@
^^^~^ ^ ~~^ ^ ~^ ^~
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.