RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
&..&&&&&&& ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ .........&
....&&&&&. &&&&&&&&..
&&&..&&&.. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &&&&&&&..&
&&....&..& THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &&&&&&....
...&&..... ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &&&&&..&&.
&&....&&&& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. .&&&......
...&&..&&& ..&..&&&&.
&&......&& MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ......&&..
...&&&&..& THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH &&&&&.....
&&..&&.... IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &&&&..&&&&
&......&&& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM &&&....&&&
..&&&&..&. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE &&..&&..&&
...&&..... DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &.........
&&....&&&. COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ..&&&&&&&&
&..&&..&.. ...&&&&&&&
.........& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &&..&&&&&&
.&&&&&&&.. CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR &....&&&&.
..&&&&&... COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ..&&..&&..
&..&&&..&& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .........&
....&..... OPERATION. &&&&&&&&..
&&&...&&&& .&&&&&&..&
&&..&..&&. SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ..&&&&....
.......... NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ...&&..&&.
&&&&&&&&&& &&........
.&&&&&&&&& ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ...&&&&&&.
..&&&&&&&. ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ &&..&&&&..
&..&&&&&.. .....&&..&
....&&&... ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ &&&&......
&&&..&..&& ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ .&&..&&&&&
&&........ ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ ......&&&&
&..&&&&&&& ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ &&&&&..&&&
....&&&&&. &&&&....&&
.&&..&&&.. ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ .&&..&&...
......&... ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ ........&&
.&&&&...&& ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ &&&&&&&...
..&&..&... &&&&&&..&&
........&& ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ .&&&&.....
&&&&&&&..& ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ..&&..&&&&
&&&&&&.... ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ .......&&&
&&&&&..&&& ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ &&&&&&..&&
&&&&....&& ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ &&&&&....&
&&&..&&... &&&&..&&..
.&......&& ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ &&&.......
,,,~, , ~~, , ~, ,~
, ,, , , . ,. .
. . * .
.
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.