party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off, shower curtains  drawn.  floor full 
 of  dirty clothes, of garbage,  and as i 
 start to unzip  my pants,  she steps out 
 of   the  shower  and   pushes   me   to 
 theground. 
  
 i   wish  to   be   contacted  by   some 
 [god, alien]  who  would bestow upon  me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything right  forever. what i  don't 
 know  is  that  this  happens   multiple 
 times per  second - they  ask  me: "when 
 you  said the world egg was  your  ideal 
 body type, did  you mean  it"?  i answer 
 "not really,  but i can  act like it for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory of  the encounter  and  moved on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom