EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS    THINKING   TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN THE  WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW HOW USEFUL  THEY HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM,  THE LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE  ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT LIKE,  AND THERE WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM   THINGS   THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG TIME  I  COULD NOT  SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I SHOULD AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR AT  LEAST THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND   SOMETIMES  STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID   NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST  DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING  ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD  OF CONCEPTS  THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER  BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY  EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH,  RATHER JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW  AND THEN I HEAR  THIS SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT  I THINK  IT HAS TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.