dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i   wake  suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over  my vision,  pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches  in my mind. it's like 
 language,  sentences i can't hide  from, 
 forcefully  transcribed  in my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless, but  i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl  on the floor searching 
 relief, such  is  my nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but  time does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess?  i shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick  on  the nose, that's 
 what these are. like you  do  with a cat 
 who comes  to  close to your sandwich...