THE  GOLDEN          
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT ALL  BEGAN  A THOUSAND  YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP,  WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO  BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART, NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN THE  DAY SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE  EVE SHE  SOLD HER WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS,  MARIGOLDS  FOOD CART 
 HAD   A  REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT  THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE  OLD TAVERN  HAD  THEIR MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME A  LITTLE  TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS   MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME  IN EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED. AND  SOON  ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED  WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE  HID THE CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY  YEARS,   A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.  HE   WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED, I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA TO  FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF A  COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE  GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS  KIND OF A  HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE TAVERN DIDN'T CARE  FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO  THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS  IN THE PROCESS  OF  FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR  NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT  HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE,  BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP ON 
           EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.          
 UPON FINDING OUT  THAT  EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR COW  MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH  FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN  HE GOT  SCAMMED OUT OF THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!