dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything  is  completely calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing  in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind.  it's like 
 language,  sentences i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic  in it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape.  to crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such is  my nature. turning  the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does noting... but  time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick  on the nose,  that's 
 what these are. like you do  with a  cat 
 who comes to  close to  your sandwich...