LIFE                
                                    
                                    
                                          
     A MULTITUDE OF  DEFINITIONS    
       DOES    NOT   HELP.   WE       
      CAN     SAY     "LIFE     IS      
       WHAT    WE    ARE,   AND       
       WHAT  THINGS  LIKE  US       
        ARE",   BUT   THEN   WE       
     MUST    ALSO    DEFINE    WHAT     
     "THINGS  LIKE  US"  ACTUALLY     
      ENTAILS, HOW  IT SHOULD       
       BE  MEASURED,   WHO   OR       
     WHAT    IS    THE    ARBITER,      
       AND   SO  INSTEAD  THERE       
           IS   THIS   INTERNATIONALLY 
 SANCTIONED      LIST                  
          OF CRITERIA           
                                          
 - LIFE MUST PRODUCE OR CONSUME MILK      
 - LIFE MUST HAVE A BEGINNING AND AN END  
 - LIFE CAN HAVE DREAMS AND CAN INTERACT  
 - LIFE CAN STEAL                         
 - LIFE CAN BE CURSED