LIFE                
                                    
                                    
                                          
      A MULTITUDE OF DEFINITIONS    
       DOES    NOT   HELP.   WE       
      CAN     SAY     "LIFE     IS      
        WHAT   WE   ARE,   AND        
       WHAT  THINGS  LIKE  US       
        ARE",   BUT   THEN   WE       
     MUST    ALSO    DEFINE    WHAT     
     "THINGS  LIKE  US"  ACTUALLY     
       ENTAILS,  HOW  IT  SHOULD    
       BE   MEASURED,   WHO   OR      
     WHAT     IS    THE    ARBITER,     
       AND  SO   INSTEAD  THERE       
           IS   THIS   INTERNATIONALLY 
 SANCTIONED      LIST                  
           OF  CRITERIA         
                                          
 - LIFE MUST PRODUCE OR CONSUME MILK      
 - LIFE MUST HAVE A BEGINNING AND AN END  
 - LIFE CAN HAVE DREAMS AND CAN INTERACT  
 - LIFE CAN STEAL                         
 - LIFE CAN BE CURSED