THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT ALL BEGAN  A  THOUSAND YEARS  AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE EMERGED  FROM  A  TAVERN  AFTER A 
 FEW  YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES,  OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN  THE SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN THE  DAY  SHE SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE SHE SOLD HER WARES,  AND IN  THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER  A  FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.  SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT THE GOLDEN  M. 
 THE  OLD TAVERN  HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER,  SHE  BECAME  A LITTLE TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON   HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION. SHE  FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN  THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE HID THE  CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY  YEARS,   A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND   THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA TO  FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL  THAT OF A  COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH  SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND OF  A HARDHAT  AND DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING.  THE  TAVERN DIDN'T CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD  EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS  IN THE PROCESS  OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW  HE TRAVELED 
 OR  WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE  SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH  FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN HE  GOT  SCAMMED OUT OF THE CART BY 
 A MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT, AND QUICKLY  EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!