THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A  THOUSAND  YEARS AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE EMERGED  FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW  YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
         BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.        
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING  IN THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN  THE DAY  SHE SLEPT, IN 
 THE  EVE SHE SOLD HER WARES, AND  IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD  A   REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE TALKED ABOUT THE  GOLDEN  M. 
 THE  OLD  TAVERN HAD  THEIR MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A LITTLE  TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT   ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN  EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR  HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE HID  THE  CART, AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN  NAMED 
 NICHOLAS   FOUND  THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND  AS  SUCH  HE OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT  A GOOD IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT  OF A COOK,  AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS  KIND  OF  A HARDHAT AND DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE TAVERN  DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND  ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS  IN THE PROCESS  OF  FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,   HE    VOWED    TO   LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT  KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT  EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING  OUT THAT  EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS,  HE SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS  JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN  HE GOT SCAMMED  OUT OF THE CART BY 
 A  MAN NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT,  AND QUICKLY  EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!