FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH  (THE  PLANET WHERE  I  LIVE) A 
 LOT  OF  US  HAVE ANTENNAS ON OUR HOUSES 
 OR   BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE  BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR  LARGER BANDWITH,  WE HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO ORBIT), WE'VE  BUILT LARGE AS  FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY  BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH A 
          DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.         
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT OUR  POSITION IN THE 
     SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS      
 PLACEMENT  IN   THE  GALAXY,   AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN THE  LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR LOCAL  CLUSTERS  PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE SUNS MOVING AROUND  THE 
 CENTER  OF THE  GALAXY  AT  VELOCITY AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS  MOVING  TOWARD ANDROMEDA 
    AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE   
 AROUND  THE GALAXY. AND  WE AS A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE  ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL  OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES OUT  IN FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT IS OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO      ONE        HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS TO  INTELLIGENT LIFE  IN 
 THE  UNIVERSE SAY  IT'S BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A  CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER STAR AND  THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE  STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT   REALLY  ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES  THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT WE'RE  DOING (AND  IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA GO SMOKE  MY  THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR AND TRY  TO  SNATCH SOME BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING