FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH  (THE  PLANET  WHERE I LIVE)  A 
 LOT  OF US  HAVE  ANTENNAS ON OUR HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,  WE   HAVE   BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS FOR LARGER  BANDWITH,  WE  HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
   SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM    
 INTO  ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT LARGE AS  FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE  VIRTUALLY BUILT AN ANTENNA WITH A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE  LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT  IN   THE   GALAXY,  AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS  PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR LOCAL  CLUSTERS  PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY  AND THE SUNS MOVING AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF THE  GALAXY AT  VELOCITY  AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS  MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
    AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE   
 AROUND THE GALAXY.  AND WE AS A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE  ALL  THIS, DESPITE ALL  OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES OUT  IN FUCKING  SPACE 
 AT THE  SPEED  OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING  OF  ALL  OUR  SECRETS IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE       HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
             SO WHY IS THAT?              
                                          
 MOST  OPPONENTS  TO INTELLIGENT  LIFE IN 
 THE UNIVERSE SAY  IT'S  BECAUSE YOU NEED 
 A  CLASS ONE-OR-THE-OTHER STAR  AND  THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM THE STAR (LIKE  THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY  ISN'T  THAT   KEEPING   THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES  THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT  WE'RE DOING (AND  IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA  GO  SMOKE MY THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS  YEAR AND TRY TO SNATCH SOME  BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING