FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 ON EARTH (THE  PLANET  WHERE I  LIVE)  A 
 LOT OF  US  HAVE ANTENNAS ON  OUR HOUSES 
 OR  BALCONIES,   WE  HAVE   BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS FOR  LARGER  BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
     BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR      
    SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM   
 INTO ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT  LARGE AS  FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT  AN ANTENNA WITH A 
          DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.         
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION  IN THE 
     SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS      
 PLACEMENT   IN  THE   GALAXY,  AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS  PLACEMENT IN THE LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND  OUR LOCAL  CLUSTERS PLACE  IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE SUNS MOVING AROUND  THE 
 CENTER  OF  THE GALAXY AT  VELOCITY  AND 
 THE  GALAXY IS  MOVING TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND  THE  GALAXY. AND WE AS A SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND  DESPITE ALL THIS,  DESPITE  ALL OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES OUT  IN  FUCKING SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED OF  LIGHT  (LIGHT IS  OUR 
 MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!),  
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
   FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS    
 BEAMING  OF  ALL OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO        ONE      HAS       ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST OPPONENTS  TO  INTELLIGENT LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE SAY IT'S  BECAUSE YOU  NEED 
 A  CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM  THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY   ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING  THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES  THAT WE HAVE NO 
 IDEA  WHAT WE'RE DOING  (AND IT PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
       FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA GO  SMOKE  MY  THIRD CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR AND TRY TO SNATCH  SOME  BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING