FERMI'S PARADOX      
                          
                                          
 ON  EARTH  (THE PLANET  WHERE I LIVE)  A 
 LOT  OF US  HAVE ANTENNAS ON  OUR HOUSES 
 OR   BALCONIES,  WE  HAVE   BUILT  LARGE 
 ANTENNAS  FOR LARGER  BANDWITH, WE  HAVE 
      BUILD SPECIALIZED ANTENNAES FOR     
   SPECIFIC WAVELENGTHS (AND SENT THEM    
 INTO ORBIT), WE'VE BUILT LARGE  AS  FUCK 
              ANTENNA ARRAYS              
 WE'VE VIRTUALLY BUILT  AN ANTENNA WITH A 
         DISH AS LARGE AS EARTH.          
                                          
 WE'VE LEARNED ABOUT OUR POSITION  IN THE 
      SOLAR SYSTEM, OUR SOLAR SYSTEMS     
 PLACEMENT   IN  THE  GALAXY,   AND   OUR 
 GALAXYS PLACEMENT IN THE  LOCAL CLUSTER, 
 AND OUR  LOCAL  CLUSTERS  PLACE IN THE 
          GRAND SCHEME OF THINGS          
                                          
 AND  WE'RE  MOVING  AROUND  THE  SUN  AT 
 VELOCITY AND THE SUNS MOVING  AROUND THE 
 CENTER  OF THE GALAXY  AT  VELOCITY  AND 
 THE GALAXY IS  MOVING  TOWARD  ANDROMEDA 
   AND WE'RE BOTH MOVING ANTICLOCKWISE    
 AROUND THE GALAXY. AND WE  AS A  SPECIES 
 HAVE LEARNED TO TAKE ALL THAT IN ACCOUNT 
                                          
 AND DESPITE  ALL THIS,  DESPITE  ALL OUR 
   (CLICHE) BEAMING OF FUCKING STELLAR    
 RADIO  PROGRAMMES OUT  IN  FUCKING SPACE 
 AT  THE  SPEED  OF  LIGHT (LIGHT  IS OUR 
  MEDIUM! GOODSPEED YOU, BLACK EMPEROR!), 
      DESPITE GHOSTS HELPING AND THE      
     COLLECTIVE CONSCIOUSNESS LOWPASS     
    FILTERING, DESPITE OUR VERY OBVIOUS   
 BEAMING  OF ALL  OUR  SECRETS  IN  EVERY 
          DIRECTION KNOWN TO US,          
                                          
 NO       ONE      HAS        ANSWERED 
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
              SO WHY IS THAT?             
                                          
 MOST OPPONENTS  TO INTELLIGENT  LIFE  IN 
 THE UNIVERSE  SAY IT'S BECAUSE YOU  NEED 
 A CLASS  ONE-OR-THE-OTHER  STAR  AND THE 
 PLANET  NEEDS  TO  BE  AT  A  SEE-AND-SO 
 DISTANCE AWAY FROM  THE STAR (LIKE THERE 
           HAS TO BE A PLANET!)           
                                          
 BUT  REALLY  ISN'T   THAT  KEEPING   THE 
      DEFINITION OF LIFE REALLY LAX?      
                                          
 I THINK EVERYONE AGREES THAT WE  HAVE NO 
 IDEA WHAT WE'RE DOING (AND  IT  PROBABLY 
                  SHOWS)                  
                                          
                          
      FERMI'S PARADOX       
                          
                                          
 I'M GONNA  GO  SMOKE MY THIRD  CIGARETTE 
 THIS YEAR  AND  TRY TO SNATCH SOME BEERS 
        FROM THE LOCAL BEER THING