RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¤¤
¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¨ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨
¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¤ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¤¤¨¤¤¤¨¤¨¨
¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¤¤¨¨¤¤¤¨¤
¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¤ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¤¤
¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¤¤¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¤¤¤¤¤¨¤¨¨¨
¤¤¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨ ¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨
¨¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¤¤ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¨¨¤ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¤¤¨¤¤¨¤¤
¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¨¤¨¨¤¤¤¤¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¤¤¤¨¤¤¨¤¤¨
¨¤¤¨¤¨¨¨¤¤ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨¤¤¨¤¤¨¤¨
¤¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¤¤¨
¤¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¤¤¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¤
¨¤¨¤¤¤¨¤¨¨ ¨¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¨¨
¤¤¤¨¨¤¤¤¨¤ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¤¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¤¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¤¤¤¨¤¨¤¤ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¤
¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¨¤ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤
¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¨ OPERATION. ¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨
¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¤¨ ¤¤¤¤¨¤¨¤¤¤
¤¤¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¨¨¨
¨¤¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¤
¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¤¨ ¨¤¤¨¨¤¤¨¤¤
¤¨¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¨ ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¨
¤¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¤¨ ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« ¤¤¤¤¤¤¨¤¨¤
¤¤¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¨ ¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¨
¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¤ ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« ¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤
¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤ ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« ¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨ ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« ¨¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¤¤
¤¤¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¨ ««# AND AT EASE #«« ¨¤¤¤¤¤¨¨¨¤
¨¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¤ ¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨
¨¨¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¤¤¨
¨¨¤¤¤¤¤¤¨¤ ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨
¨¤¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¨ ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« ¤¨¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¨
¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¨ ¤¤¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¨
¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¤ ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« ¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¤
¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨ ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« ¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¨ ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« ¨¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¨
¤¤¤¨¤¨¨¨¨¨ ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¨
¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¨¤ ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« ¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤
¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤ ¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¤
¤¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¨¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¤¤
,,,«, , ««, , «, ,«
, ,, , , ¨ ,¨ ¨
¨ ¨ † ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.