RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
&&&&.&...& »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» &.&....&..
&...&&&..& .&&&...&&.
&&..&..&.& THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN &&..&..&.&
..&.&&.&&& THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ..&.&&.&&&
&.&&&.&&.. ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL &.&&&.&&..
&&&..&&.&. CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &&&..&&.&.
&..&.&.&&& &..&.&.&&&
.&.&&&&&.. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&.&&&&&..
.&&&....&. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ..&&....&.
.&..&...&& IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO &.&.&...&&
&&&.&&..&. THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM .&&&&&..&.
&..&&.&.&& WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE &&....&.&&
.&.&.&&&&. DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ..&...&&&.
.&&&&&...& COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ..&&..&..&
&&....&..& ..&.&.&&.&
..&...&&.& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND &.&&&&&.&&
&.&&..&.&& CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR .&&....&&.
&&&.&.&&&. COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE &&.&...&.&
...&&&&..& WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ..&&&..&&&
&..&...&.& OPERATION. &.&..&.&..
&&.&&..&&& .&&&.&&&&.
&.&&.&.&.. SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY &&..&&...&
.&&.&&&&&. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: &.&.&.&..&
&&.&&....& .&&&&&&&.&
..&&.&...& »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» .&......&&
&.&.&&&..& »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» .&&.....&.
&&&&&..&.& .&.&....&&
.....&.&&& »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» &&&&&...&.
.....&&&.. »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» &....&..&&
&....&..&. »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» .&...&&.&.
&&...&&.&& »»# AND AT EASE #»» &&&..&.&&&
..&..&.&&. ...&.&&&..
..&&.&&&.& »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» &..&&&..&.
..&.&&..&& »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» .&.&..&.&&
&.&&&.&.&. »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» .&&&&.&&&.
&&&..&&&&& .&...&&..&
...&.&.... »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» &&&..&.&.&
&..&&&&... »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» &..&.&&&&&
.&.&...&.. »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» &&.&&&....
.&&&&..&&. »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ..&&..&...
.&...&.&.& »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ..&.&.&&..
.&&..&&&&& ..&&&&&.&.
.&.&.&.... »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» &.&....&&&
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.