RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨#¨###¨¨## »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨#####¨#¨¨
¨###¨¨#¨#¨ ¨#¨¨¨¨###¨
¨#¨¨#¨#### THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨##¨¨¨#¨¨#
###¨###¨¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ##¨#¨¨##¨#
¨¨¨##¨¨#¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨###¨#¨##
#¨¨#¨#¨##¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨#¨¨####¨
##¨#####¨# #¨##¨#¨¨¨#
¨¨##¨¨¨¨## MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ###¨###¨¨#
#¨#¨#¨¨¨#¨ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¨##¨¨#¨#
¨#####¨¨## IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨¨¨#¨#¨###
##¨¨¨¨#¨#¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM #¨¨#####¨¨
#¨#¨¨¨#### WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨#¨#¨¨¨¨#¨
####¨¨#¨¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨####¨¨¨##
¨¨¨¨#¨##¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ##¨¨¨#¨¨#¨
¨¨¨¨###¨#¨ ¨¨#¨¨##¨##
#¨¨¨#¨¨### IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨##¨#¨##¨
##¨¨##¨#¨¨ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR #¨#¨####¨#
¨¨#¨#¨###¨ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE #####¨¨¨##
#¨#####¨¨# WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE #¨¨¨¨#¨¨#¨
###¨¨¨¨#¨# OPERATION. ##¨¨¨##¨##
¨¨¨#¨¨¨### ¨¨#¨¨#¨##¨
¨¨¨##¨¨#¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¨¨##¨###¨#
#¨¨#¨#¨##¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨#¨##¨¨##
¨#¨#####¨# #¨###¨#¨#¨
¨###¨¨¨¨## »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ###¨¨#####
##¨¨#¨¨¨#¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» #¨¨#¨#¨¨¨¨
#¨#¨##¨¨## ##¨####¨¨¨
#####¨#¨#¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» #¨##¨¨¨#¨¨
#¨¨¨¨##### »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» ###¨#¨¨##¨
##¨¨¨#¨¨¨¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» #¨¨###¨#¨#
¨¨#¨¨##¨¨¨ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¨#¨#¨¨####
#¨##¨#¨#¨¨ #####¨#¨¨¨
###¨#####¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» ¨¨¨¨¨###¨¨
#¨¨##¨¨¨¨# »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» #¨¨¨¨#¨¨#¨
##¨#¨#¨¨¨# »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨#¨¨¨##¨##
¨¨#####¨¨# ###¨¨#¨##¨
¨¨#¨¨¨¨#¨# »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¨¨¨#¨###¨#
#¨##¨¨¨### »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨¨¨###¨¨##
¨##¨#¨¨#¨¨ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» #¨¨#¨¨#¨#¨
¨#¨###¨##¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨#¨##¨####
####¨¨##¨# »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ¨###¨##¨¨¨
#¨¨¨#¨#¨## ¨#¨¨##¨#¨¨
##¨¨#####¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨##¨#¨###¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.