RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨§§¨¨§¨§§§ ---------------------------------------- §§¨§§§¨¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨§¨§                                          §§¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§ THE COMPUTER IS  A VERY  COMMON  TOOL IN §§¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨§ THE FUTURES,  AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. §§§¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨ ITS  JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF  SMALL §¨§§¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF  TIME. ¨¨§§§¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨§¨§§¨                                          ¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨¨§§§ MOST  WORK  ON THE PRINCIPLES OF  POSING ¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨§¨§ THE  PROBLEM ON A  HILBERT PLANE,  WHICH §¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§ IS  THEN FOLDED  OUT  OF  CAUSALITY,  SO §§¨¨¨¨§§§¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨§ THAT  DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE   THE  PROBLEM ¨§§¨¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨    WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE   ¨§§§¨¨¨¨§§
§§¨¨¨§§§¨¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE ¨§¨§§¨¨¨§¨
§§§¨¨§¨§§¨         COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)          ¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨¨§§§                                          §¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨§¨§   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   §§¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨§ CLERKS  TO PRAY TO THE "GODS"  OF  THEIR §§§¨¨§¨§§¨
¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨§ COMPUTER,  OR  TO THE  DAEMONS DOING THE §¨§§¨¨¨§§§
§¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨ WORK,   FOR   A  QUICK  AND  FAULT  FREE ¨¨§§§¨¨§¨§
§§¨¨¨¨§§§¨                OPERATION.                ¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨§
¨§§¨¨¨§¨§§                                          §¨¨¨§§§¨¨§
¨§§§¨¨¨¨§§      SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY       ¨§¨¨§¨§§¨¨
¨§¨§§¨¨¨§¨    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    ¨¨§¨¨¨§§§¨
¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨§¨¨§¨§§
§¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨      --# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #--      ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨§§
§§¨¨¨§§§¨¨        --# FOR QUIET AND CALM #--        ¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨
§§§¨¨§¨§§¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
§¨§§¨¨¨§§§     --# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #--     ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨§¨§    --# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #--    ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨§     --# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #--     §¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨§§§¨¨§            --# AND AT EASE #--           ¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨§¨§§¨¨                                          ¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨§§§¨     --# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #--     ¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨§¨§§     --# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #--     ¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨§§   --# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #--   §¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨§¨                                          §§¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨    --# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #--   ¨§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨    --# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #--     ¨§§§¨¨¨¨§¨
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨    --# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #--     ¨§¨§§¨¨¨¨§
§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨§     --# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #--      ¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨        --# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #--       ¨¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨§§§¨¨
¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨¨ ---------------------------------------- ¨¨¨¨¨§¨§§¨
           ^^^-^      ^   --^   ^           -^   ^-           
           ^     ^^     ^     ^      ¨     ^¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  §      ¨           
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           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO     BE    A    KIND    OF     PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU   MAKE   A    CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,    BEAUTIFUL,   AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.   AS  IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D   ASK  FOR  A  HANDFUL  OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE   HAS    BUGS,    LOTS    OF    IT.