RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION                     
                                                              
¨§§§¨¨¨¨¨§ ---------------------------------------- ¨§¨§¨¨§¨¨§
§§¨¨§¨¨¨¨§                                          ¨§§§§¨§§¨§
¨¨§¨§§¨¨¨§ THE  COMPUTER IS  A  VERY COMMON TOOL IN §§¨¨¨§§¨§§
§¨§§§¨§¨¨§ THE FUTURES, AND IN  SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨§¨¨§¨§§¨
§§§¨¨§§§¨§ ITS JOB IS TO  DO VAST AMOUNTS OF  SMALL §¨§§¨§§§¨§
¨¨¨§¨§¨¨§§ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT  AMOUNT OF TIME. §§§¨§§¨¨§§
§¨¨§§§§¨§¨                                          §¨¨§§¨§¨§¨
§§¨§¨¨¨§§§ MOST  WORK ON THE  PRINCIPLES OF  POSING ¨§¨§¨§§§§§
¨¨§§§¨¨§¨¨ THE  PROBLEM ON A HILBERT  PLANE,  WHICH §§§§§§¨¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨§¨§§¨ IS  THEN  FOLDED  OUT  OF CAUSALITY,  SO ¨¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨
¨¨§§¨§§§¨§ THAT   DAEMONS  CAN  SOLVE  THE  PROBLEM §¨¨¨¨¨§§¨¨
¨¨§¨§§¨¨§§    WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE   ¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§¨
¨¨§§§¨§¨§¨ DAEMONS  ARE  UNDER  CONTRACT  WITH  THE §§§¨¨¨§§§§
§¨§¨¨§§§§§          COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.)         ¨¨¨§¨¨§¨¨¨
§§§§¨§¨¨¨¨                                          §¨¨§§¨§§¨¨
§¨¨¨§§§¨¨¨   IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND   §§¨§¨§§¨§¨
§§¨¨§¨¨§¨¨ CLERKS  TO  PRAY TO THE  "GODS" OF THEIR §¨§§§§¨§§§
¨¨§¨§§¨§§¨ COMPUTER, OR  TO THE DAEMONS  DOING  THE §§§¨¨¨§§¨¨
¨¨§§§¨§§¨§ WORK,  FOR   A  QUICK  AND  FAULT   FREE §¨¨§¨¨§¨§¨
¨¨§¨¨§§¨§§                OPERATION.                §§¨§§¨§§§§
§¨§§¨§¨§§¨                                          ¨¨§§¨§§¨¨¨
§§§¨§§§§¨§       SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY      §¨§¨§§¨§¨¨
§¨¨§§¨¨¨§§    NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE:    §§§§§¨§§§¨
§§¨§¨§¨¨§¨                                          ¨¨¨¨¨§§¨¨§
¨¨§§§§§¨§§      --# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #--      §¨¨¨¨§¨§¨§
§¨§¨¨¨¨§§¨        --# FOR QUIET AND CALM #--        §§¨¨¨§§§§§
¨§§§¨¨¨§¨§                                          §¨§¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨§¨¨§§§     --# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #--     ¨§§§¨§§¨¨¨
¨§§¨§§¨§¨¨    --# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #--    §§¨¨§§¨§¨¨
¨§¨§§¨§§§¨     --# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #--     §¨§¨§¨§§§¨
¨§§§¨§§¨¨§           --# AND AT EASE #--            ¨§§§§§§¨¨§
§§¨¨§§¨§¨§                                          ¨§¨¨¨¨¨§¨§
¨¨§¨§¨§§§§     --# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #--     ¨§§¨¨¨¨§§§
§¨§§§§§¨¨¨     --# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #--     §§¨§¨¨¨§¨¨
§§§¨¨¨¨§¨¨   --# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #--   §¨§§§¨¨§§¨
§¨¨§¨¨¨§§¨                                          ¨§§¨¨§¨§¨§
¨§¨§§¨¨§¨§    --# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #--   §§¨§¨§§§§§
§§§§¨§¨§§§     --# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #--    §¨§§§§¨¨¨¨
§¨¨¨§§§§¨¨    --# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #--     §§§¨¨¨§¨¨¨
§§¨¨§¨¨¨§¨     --# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #--      ¨¨¨§¨¨§§¨¨
§¨§¨§§¨¨§§        --# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #--       §¨¨§§¨§¨§¨
§§§§§¨§¨§¨                                          §§¨§¨§§§§§
¨¨¨¨¨§§§§§ ---------------------------------------- §¨§§§§¨¨¨¨
           ~~~-~     ~   --~   ~            -~   ~-           
           ~     ~~     ~      ~     ¨     ~¨     ¨           
           ¨            ¨                  %      ¨           
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           WOULD    YOU    CONSIDER    CODE    GOLF           
           TO    BE    A     KIND    OF     PRAYER?           
           AS   IN,   YOU    MAKE   A   CONVOLUTED,           
           INTRICATE,   BEAUTIFUL,    AND   USELESS           
           ARTIFACT.   AS  IN,  YOU'RE  USING  YOUR           
           SKILLS    TO    ASK    FOR    SOMETHING,           
                                                              
           ...I'D  ASK  FOR  A  HANDFUL   OF  BUGS?           
                                                              
           CODE    HAS    BUGS,    LOTS    OF   IT.