RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
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####.##... THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN #.#####..#
....##.#.. THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ###....#.#
#...#.###. ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ...#...###
.#..###..# CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. #..##..#..
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.#.###.### MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING #.######.#
####..##.. THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ###.....##
....#.#.#. IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ...#....#.
....###### THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ...##...##
#...#..... WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ...#.#..#.
##..##.... DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ...####.##
..#.#.#... COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ...#...##.
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#.#.....#. IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND .#.#.#.###
.###....## CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR .#######..
.#..#...#. COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE .#......#.
.##.##..## WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ###.....##
##.##.#.#. OPERATION. ...#....#.
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.##.##.... SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ...#.#..#.
.#.##.#... NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ...####.##
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#...##..#. »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ##.##..#.#
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#..##....# »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ..###...#.
##.#.#...# »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» ..#..#..##
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..#....#.# »»# AND AT EASE #»» ###.##.###
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###.#..#.. »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» .#.#.##.#.
#..###.##. »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ######.###
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.#...####. »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» .#....####
###..#...# »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ###...#...
#..#.##..# »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» #..#..##..
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#.##..#### »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ####.#####
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.