EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING    TO   STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE I 
 DO NOT  KNOW  HOW USEFUL  THEY HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY? I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW  TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE  ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT  LIKE,  AND THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM  THINGS   THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE, FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD NOT SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I SHOULD AVOID  TO  RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED OR  AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE  EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY   DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST  DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE  I'M SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD OF CONCEPTS  THIS  "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL  NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY  EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN  I HEAR THIS  SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS  ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL,  BUT  I THINK IT HAS TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.