RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¤¨¨
¨¤¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¨ ¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¤¨
¨¤¤¤¤¨¨¤¨¤ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¤
¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¤¤¤ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¤¤¨¤¤¨¤¤¤¨
¤¨¤¨¨¤¤¤¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨¨¤¤¨¤¤¨¨¤
¨¤¤¤¨¤¨¨¤¨ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤
¤¤¨¨¤¤¤¨¤¤ ¨¨¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¤
¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¤¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¨¨¤¨¨¤¤¨¨¨
¨¨¤¤¤¤¨¤¨¤ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¤¨¨
¨¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¤¤ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¤¤¨
¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¨ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¨¨¤
¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¨ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¨¤
¨¤¤¤¤¤¤¨¤¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¨¨¤
¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¤ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨¤
¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨ ¤¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¤¤
¤¨¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤¨¨
¤¤¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¨¤¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¨
¤¨¨¤¤¤¨¤¤¤ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¤¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¤¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¤
¤¤¤¤¤¨¤¨¤¨ OPERATION. ¤¤¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¤
¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¤ ¨¨¤¤¤¤¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¤¨¤¨¨¨¤¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¤¤¤¤¨¨¤¤¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¤¨¤¨¤¨
¨¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¨ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¨¨¨¨¤¤¤¤¤¤
¤¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¤ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» ¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¨¨¨
¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¤ ¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¨¨
¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¤ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¨
¤¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¤¤ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» ¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¤¨¨
¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¨¨ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ¨¨¨¤¤¨¨¨¤¨
¤¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¨ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¤¨¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¤
¨¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¨¨ ¨¤¨¤¤¤¤¨¤¨
¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» ¤¤¤¤¨¨¨¤¤¤
¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¤ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¨¨¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨
¤¤¤¤¨¤¤¨¤¨ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¤¤¨
¤¨¨¨¤¤¨¤¤¤ ¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¨¤¨¤¤¨¨ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¨¤¤¨¤¤¤¨¤¤
¤¤¤¨¤¤¤¨¤¨ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» ¨¤¨¤¤¨¨¤¤¨
¤¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¤¤ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨¤¤¤¨¤¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¨ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» ¨¤¨¨¤¤¤¤¤¤
¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¨ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ¤¤¤¨¤¨¨¨¨¨
¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¤ ¨¨¨¤¤¤¨¨¨¨
¤¤¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¤ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¤¨¨¤¨¨¤¨¨¨
:::»: : »»: : »: :»
: :: : : ¨ :¨ ¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.