RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
..&&&&.... ---------------------------------------- .&.......&
.&...&...& &&......&&
&&..&&..&. THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN .&.....&.&
.&.&.&.&&. THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. &&....&&&.
&&&&&&&.&. ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL .&...&..&.
......&&&& CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. &&..&&.&&&
.....&.... .&.&.&&..&
....&&.... MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING &&&&&.&.&&
...&.&.... THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ....&&&&.&
..&&&&.... IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ...&...&&&
.&...&...& THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ..&&..&..&
&&..&&..&. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE .&.&.&&.&&
.&.&.&.&&& DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE &&&&&.&&..
&&&&&&&... COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ....&&.&..
......&..& ...&.&&&.&
.....&&.&& IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ..&&&..&&&
....&.&&.& CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR .&..&.&..&
...&&&.&&& COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE &&.&&&&.&&
..&..&&... WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE .&&...&&.&
.&&.&.&..& OPERATION. &.&..&.&&&
&.&&&&&.&. &&&.&&&..&
&&....&&&. SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ..&&..&.&.
.&...&..&. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: .&.&.&&&&&
&&..&&.&&& &&&&&....&
.&.&.&&... --# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #-- ....&...&.
&&&&&.&..& --# FOR QUIET AND CALM #-- ...&&..&&.
....&&&.&. ..&.&.&.&&
...&..&&&& --# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #-- .&&&&&&&.&
..&&.&...& --# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #-- &......&&&
.&.&&&..&. --# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #-- &.....&..&
&&&..&.&&. --# AND AT EASE #-- &....&&.&&
..&.&&&.&& &...&.&&..
.&&&..&&.& --# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #-- &..&&&.&..
&..&.&.&&. --# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #-- &.&..&&&..
&.&&&&&.&. --# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #-- &&&.&..&.&
&&....&&&& ..&&&.&&&.
.&...&...& --# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #-- .&..&&..&&
&&..&&..&& --# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #-- &&.&.&.&.&
.&.&.&.&.& --# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #-- .&&&&&&&&.
&&&&&&&&&. --# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #-- &.......&.
........&& --# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #-- &......&&&
.......&.. &.....&..&
......&&.& ---------------------------------------- &....&&.&&
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.