EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING    TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE I 
 DO NOT KNOW HOW  USEFUL  THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET SO  TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW  TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY  OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT LIKE, AND  THERE WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH  RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I SHOULD  AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR AT  LEAST THE  BURN-INS IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I  JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING  ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD OF  CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT  WILL NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST FIELDS  AND  MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN  I HEAR  THIS SOUND (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT  IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT  I THINK IT  HAS TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.