dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for   a  second 
 everything  is completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece   together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile. i can feel them  squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind. it's  like 
 language, sentences i can't  hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my mind,  and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't  hear anything 
      because there's something there     
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely calm.  it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl  on the floor searching 
 relief,  such  is my nature. turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't   know    what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if you  wander  too far, 
 i  guess?  i shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick on the  nose,  that's 
 what these are. like you do  with a  cat 
 who comes to  close to your  sandwich...