dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for   a  second 
 everything is completely calm  and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to   piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and   i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles  and crosses inscribed 
 all over  my vision,  pressing in, being 
 almost  hostile. i can feel them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i can't  hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i  realize i  can't  hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief,  such is my nature.  turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but  time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this  can happen if you wander too  far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a prick on  the  nose, that's 
 what these  are. like  you do with a cat 
 who  comes to  close to your sandwich...