dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,   and  for  a  second 
 everything is completely  calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to  piece   together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits   me  and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are  circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can  feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding trenches in my  mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully  transcribed in  my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize i can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
              almost mocking.             
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to  crawl on the floor searching 
 relief, such is  my nature. turning  the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything  of  this happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are  still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what    to   make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can  happen if you wander too  far, 
 i  guess?  i  shouldn't  be so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a prick on  the  nose,  that's 
 what  these are. like you do with a  cat 
 who comes  to close to  your sandwich...