dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything  is completely calm and  dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly   start   to  piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and   i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and crosses  inscribed 
 all over  my  vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding trenches in my mind.  it's like 
 language,  sentences i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my  mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i realize i  can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my  surroundings are entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the  floor searching 
 relief, such is my  nature.  turning the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting...  but time  does  - after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting  anything of  this happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still  tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know   what    to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen if  you wander too  far, 
 i  guess?  i shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick  on the nose, that's 
 what these are. like  you do with  a cat 
 who comes  to close to  your sandwich...