dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake   suddenly,  and  for  a  second 
 everything is  completely calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to  piece  together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me  and   i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all  over  my vision, pressing in, being 
 almost hostile.  i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences  i  can't hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed in  my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then  i realize  i can't  hear  anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid melody,  almost  caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings  are entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i  must try  to 
 escape. to crawl on  the floor searching 
 relief, such  is my nature. turning  the 
     lights on does nothing... getting    
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but time  does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense though,  scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you wander  too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine a  prick on  the  nose, that's 
 what  these are. like you do with  a cat 
 who comes  to close to your  sandwich...