dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and  for   a  second 
 everything  is completely  calm and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start   to   piece  together  my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
   acutely sick. something is wrong.    
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there are circles and  crosses inscribed 
 all over my  vision, pressing in,  being 
 almost hostile.  i can feel them squirm, 
    their internal logic changing and     
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i can't  hide  from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in my mind,  and 
            doing damage there.           
                                          
 then i  realize  i  can't  hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost  caustic  in it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are entirely  calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but  i must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl on the floor  searching 
 relief, such  is  my nature. turning the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but  time does  -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of this  happened  in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes  are still tense though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you wander  too far, 
 i guess?  i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i imagine  a  prick on the nose,  that's 
 what these are. like  you do with  a cat 
 who comes to close  to  your sandwich...