THE   GOLDEN          
              M               
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN  A THOUSAND  YEARS AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE EMERGED  FROM  A  TAVERN AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH AN  IDEA. 
 IT  WAS ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG.  IN THE  DAY SHE SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE  SHE SOLD HER WARES,  AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS,  MARIGOLDS FOOD  CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED  IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE TALKED  ABOUT  THE GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR MONOPOLY  AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A  LITTLE TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT   ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION.  SHE FELT 
 HUNTED. AND SOON  ENOUGH  THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR  HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE  HID THE  CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A   MAN  NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.   HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH  HE OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA  TO FOLLOW 
          IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.         
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF A  COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY FELL  INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER HE 
 WAS  KIND OF  A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING.  THE  TAVERN DIDN'T CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND  ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN THE PROCESS OF  FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY  AT EVERYONE FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS   FOOD,    HE    VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE  TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT THAT  EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED  FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE  EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED OUT  OF THE CART  BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC DONALDS,  WHO 
   RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.    
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!