EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN THE  WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO NOT  KNOW HOW  USEFUL THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW  TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE  PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT  LIKE, AND  THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM  THINGS   THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR A 
 LONG  TIME  I COULD  NOT SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I SHOULD AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR  AT LEAST THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK  TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND  MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A  LOAD OF CONCEPTS  THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK  WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST  FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND  THEN  I HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS  ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT  HAS TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.