RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
.#..###... ---------------------------------------- ....#.....
.....#..## .##...####
.###.....# THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ....#..##.
..#..###.. THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. .##.......
#.....#..# ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ....######
..###..... CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ###..#####
...#..###. ##....###.
##.....#.. MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING #..##..#..
...###.... THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ..........
##..#..### IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ##########
#.......## THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM .#########
..#####... WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ..########
...###..## DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ...######.
##..#....# COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ##..####..
......##.. #....##...
#####..... IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ..##....##
####..#### CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR #....##..#
###....### COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ..##......
.#..##..## WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE #....####.
.......... OPERATION. ..##..##..
########## #........#
########## SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ..######..
.######### NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: #..####...
..#######. ....##..##
...#####.. --# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #-- .##.......
##..###..# --# FOR QUIET AND CALM #-- ....######
#....#.... ###..#####
..##...##. --# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #-- ##....####
.....#.... --# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #-- ...##..##.
####...### --# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #-- ##........
.##..#..## --# AND AT EASE #-- #..######.
.......... ....####..
########## --# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #-- ###..##..#
#########. --# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #-- ##........
.#######.. --# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #-- #..######.
..#####... ....####..
#..###..## --# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #-- .##..##..#
....#....# --# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #-- ..........
###...##.. --# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #-- .#########
##..#....# --# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #-- ..########
#.....##.. --# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #-- #..#######
..###..... ....######
...#..#### ---------------------------------------- ###..####.
...-. . --. . -. .-
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.