THE  GOLDEN          
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A  THOUSAND YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM  A  TAVERN AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING  OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG. IN  THE  DAY  SHE SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE SHE  SOLD HER WARES, AND  IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS,  MARIGOLDS  FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE  CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT  THE  GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME  A  LITTLE TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.   THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL, SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN  EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR  HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE  HID  THE CART,  AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A  MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.   HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT  A GOOD IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT  OF A COOK,  AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY  FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER HE 
 WAS KIND  OF A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD  EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS IN THE PROCESS  OF  FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY  AT EVERYONE FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,    HE   VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH  ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP  ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING OUT THAT  EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED  FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND  TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN  HE GOT SCAMMED OUT OF THE CART  BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS, WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!