THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
          BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE           
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL BEGAN  A THOUSAND  YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM  A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO BREAD  SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG. IN  THE DAY SHE  SLEPT,  IN 
 THE EVE  SHE SOLD HER WARES, AND IN  THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS  FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.   SHE  CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT  THE GOLDEN  M. 
 THE  OLD  TAVERN HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME A LITTLE  TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE   TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH  LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND SOON  ENOUGH  THERE  CAME A 
 TIME WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING  FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE  HID THE CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,   A  MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.   HE  WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN))  AND  AS SUCH HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD  IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF  A COOK,  AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE  GOLDEN M, HE 
 QUICKLY  FELL  INTO INFAMITY. HOWEVER HE 
 WAS  KIND OF A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T  CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY  HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS IN  THE  PROCESS  OF FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE  FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,   HE    VOWED    TO   LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE  DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT  EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON  FINDING  OUT  THAT  EARTH HOLDS NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED  FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH  FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED  OUT OF  THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT,  AND QUICKLY EXPANDED  ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!