dreams          
                          
                                   
                                          
                                       
                                 
                                       
                                          
         internal visionary state         
                                          
            the spirit travels            
                                          
                          
                                       
                                          
                  a cost                  
                (anecdote)                
                                          
                                        
                                          
 i  wake  suddenly,  and   for  a  second 
 everything is completely  calm  and dead 
 silent.  it's  dark,  and  warm,  and  i 
 slowly  start  to  piece   together   my 
        consciousness and my body.        
                                          
 then  the  fear  hits  me   and  i  feel 
    acutely sick. something is wrong.   
                                          
                                        
                                          
 there  are circles and crosses inscribed 
 all over my vision,  pressing  in, being 
 almost hostile. i can feel  them squirm, 
     their internal logic changing and    
 grinding  trenches in my mind. it's like 
 language, sentences i  can't  hide from, 
 forcefully transcribed  in  my mind, and 
           doing damage there.            
                                          
 then  i  realize  i  can't hear anything 
     because there's something there      
    already, droning everything out, a    
 rapid  melody,  almost caustic  in  it's 
         particular microtonality.        
                                          
                                        
                                          
 my surroundings are  entirely calm. it's 
             almost mocking.              
                                          
 i  feel  helpless,  but i  must  try  to 
 escape. to crawl  on the floor searching 
 relief,  such is my nature. turning  the 
    lights on does nothing... getting     
  outside does nothing... drinking water  
 does  noting... but  time  does -  after 
     thirty seconds i'm normal again,     
 doubting anything  of  this  happened in 
             the first place.             
                                          
 my eyes are still tense  though, scared. 
 i    don't    know    what   to    make. 
                                          
              but i'm tired.              
                                          
                                         
                                   
                                         
                                          
 this can happen  if you  wander too far, 
 i  guess? i  shouldn't  be  so  reckless 
              when dreaming?              
 i  imagine a prick on  the  nose, that's 
 what  these are. like you do with a  cat 
 who  comes to close to your  sandwich...