RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¨§¨§¨¨§§ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» ¨§§¨¨¨§¨§¨
¨¨¨§§§§¨§¨ §§¨§¨¨§§§§
§¨¨§¨¨¨§§§ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¨¨§§§¨§¨¨¨
§§¨§§¨¨§¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. §¨§¨¨§§§¨¨
§¨§§¨§¨§§¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL §§§§¨§¨¨§¨
§§§¨§§§§¨§ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨¨§§§¨§§
¨¨¨§§¨¨¨§§ ¨¨¨¨§¨¨§§¨
¨¨¨§¨§¨¨§¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING §¨¨¨§§¨§¨§
§¨¨§§§§¨§§ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨§¨¨§¨§§§§
¨§¨§¨¨¨§§¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¨§§¨§§§¨¨¨
¨§§§§¨¨§¨§ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM §§¨§§¨¨§¨¨
¨§¨¨¨§¨§§§ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE §¨§§¨§¨§§¨
¨§§¨¨§§§¨¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE §§§¨§§§§¨§
§§¨§¨§¨¨§¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨¨§§¨¨¨§§
¨¨§§§§§¨§§ ¨¨¨§¨§¨¨§¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨§§¨ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨¨§§§§¨§§
§¨§§¨¨¨§¨§ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR §¨¨§¨¨¨§§¨
§§§¨§¨¨§§§ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE §§¨§§¨¨§¨§
¨¨¨§§§¨§¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨§§¨§¨§§§
§¨¨§¨¨§§§¨ OPERATION. ¨¨§¨§§§§¨¨
§§¨§§¨§¨¨§ §¨§§§¨¨¨§¨
§¨§§¨§§§¨§ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY §§§¨¨§¨¨§§
¨§§¨§§¨¨§§ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¨¨¨§¨§§¨§¨
¨§¨§§¨§¨§¨ §¨¨§§§¨§§§
§§§§¨§§§§§ »»# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #»» ¨§¨§¨¨§§¨¨
§¨¨¨§§¨¨¨¨ »»# FOR QUIET AND CALM #»» §§§§§¨§¨§¨
§§¨¨§¨§¨¨¨ ¨¨¨¨¨§§§§§
¨¨§¨§§§§¨¨ »»# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #»» ¨¨¨¨¨§¨¨¨¨
¨¨§§§¨¨¨§¨ »»# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #»» §¨¨¨¨§§¨¨¨
¨¨§¨¨§¨¨§§ »»# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #»» ¨§¨¨¨§¨§¨¨
¨¨§§¨§§¨§¨ »»# AND AT EASE #»» ¨§§¨¨§§§§¨
¨¨§¨§§¨§§§ ¨§¨§¨§¨¨¨§
§¨§§§¨§§¨¨ »»# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #»» ¨§§§§§§¨¨§
¨§§¨¨§§¨§¨ »»# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #»» ¨§¨¨¨¨¨§¨§
§§¨§¨§¨§§§ »»# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #»» ¨§§¨¨¨¨§§§
¨¨§§§§§§¨¨ §§¨§¨¨¨§¨¨
¨¨§¨¨¨¨¨§¨ »»# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #»» ¨¨§§§¨¨§§¨
¨¨§§¨¨¨¨§§ »»# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #»» §¨§¨¨§¨§¨§
§¨§¨§¨¨¨§¨ »»# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #»» ¨§§§¨§§§§§
¨§§§§§¨¨§§ »»# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #»» §§¨¨§§¨¨¨¨
¨§¨¨¨¨§¨§¨ »»# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #»» ¨¨§¨§¨§¨¨¨
¨§§¨¨¨§§§§ §¨§§§§§§¨¨
¨§¨§¨¨§¨¨¨ »»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»»» §§§¨¨¨¨¨§¨
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.