RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨¨¤¤¨¨¤¤¨¤ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ OPERATION. ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# AND AT EASE #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ ¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¤¨¤
¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤¨¤ «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ¤¨¤¨¤¨¨¤¨¤
...«. . ««. . «. .«
. .. . . ¨ .¨ ¨
¨ ¨ % ¨
¨
WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.