RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
.......#.. «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ........##
.#####.... #######...
..###..### THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN ######..##
...#....## THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. #####.....
##...##... ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ####..####
#..#....## CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ###....###
.....##... ##..##..##
.###....## MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING #.........
..#..##..# THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ..########
.......... IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO ...######.
#########. THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM ##..####..
.#######.. WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE #....##...
..#####..# DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ..##....##
...###.... COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) .....##...
##..#..### ####....##
#.......## IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ###..##..#
..#####..# CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR .#........
#..###.... COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ...#######
....#..##. WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ##..######
.##....... OPERATION. #....####.
....###### ..##..##..
###..##### SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY #........#
##....###. NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: ..######..
...##..#.. #..####...
##........ ««# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #«« ....##..##
#..####### ««# FOR QUIET AND CALM #«« ###......#
....#####. ##..####..
###..###.. ««# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #«« #....##..#
##....#... ««# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #«« ..##......
...##...## ««# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #«« .....####.
##....#... ««# AND AT EASE #«« ####..##..
...##...## .##.......
##....#..# ««# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #«« ....######
#..##..... ««# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #«« .##..#####
......###. ««# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #«« ......####
.####..#.. #####..##.
..##.....# ««# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #«« ####......
#....###.. ««# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #«« .##..#####
..##..#..# ««# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #«« ......####
.......... ««# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #«« #####..##.
#########. ««# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #«« ####......
.#######.. ###..####.
..#####..# «««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««««« ##....##..
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.