party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off, shower curtains  drawn.  floor full 
 of  dirty clothes, of garbage,  and as i 
 start to unzip my pants,  she  steps out 
 of   the   shower  and   pushes   me  to 
 theground. 
  
 i  wish   to   be   contacted  by   some 
 [god,  alien] who would bestow  upon  me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything right  forever.  what i don't 
 know  is  that   this  happens  multiple 
 times per second - they  ask  me:  "when 
 you said  the  world egg was  your ideal 
 body type, did you mean  it"?  i  answer 
 "not  really, but i can act  like it for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory of  the  encounter and moved  on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom