party,  bathroom,  door  locked,  lights 
 off,  shower  curtains drawn. floor full 
 of  dirty clothes, of garbage,  and as i 
 start to  unzip my pants,  she steps out 
 of   the   shower   and  pushes   me  to 
 theground. 
  
 i   wish  to   be  contacted   by   some 
 [god, alien]  who  would bestow  upon me 
 some  incredible  power  that  will  set 
 everything right  forever. what  i don't 
 know  is  that  this   happens  multiple 
 times  per  second - they  ask me: "when 
 you  said  the world egg was your  ideal 
 body type, did  you mean it"?  i  answer 
 "not really, but i  can  act like it for 
 you,  if  you'd  like".  at  this  point 
 however  they  have  already  erased  my 
 memory of  the encounter and  moved  on. 
 subconsciously,   this   is   where   my 
 sadnesscomesfrom