EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL  THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM,  THE LAST FEW TIMES AT LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE  PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT LIKE, AND  THERE  WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH  RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR A 
 LONG  TIME  I COULD  NOT  SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I SHOULD  AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED  OR AT  LEAST THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID   NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO  MUCH 
 COFFEE.  MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD OF CONCEPTS  THIS  "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO  LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY  EYES,   NOT  ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH,  RATHER JUST FIELDS AND  MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I HEAR THIS SOUND  (A  REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT  IS ALWAYS UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL,  BUT I THINK IT HAS  TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.