THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT ALL  BEGAN  A  THOUSAND YEARS  AGO IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE EMERGED  FROM  A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN TWO  BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART, NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG. IN  THE  DAY SHE SLEPT,  IN 
 THE  EVE SHE SOLD HER WARES,  AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS  FOOD  CART 
 HAD  A   REPUTATION.   SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT  THE GOLDEN M. 
 THE  OLD TAVERN  HAD THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE  BECAME  A LITTLE  TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN   HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A  SHORTER AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH LOCATION.  SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON ENOUGH  THERE CAME  A 
 TIME  WHEN THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE  HID  THE CART,  AND DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,  A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.   HE  WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED, I  MEAN))  AND  AS  SUCH  HE OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD  IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF  A COOK, AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY  FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER HE 
 WAS  KIND OF A  HARDHAT AND DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING. THE TAVERN  DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND  ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
  QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND   
 WAS IN THE PROCESS  OF  FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT  EVERYONE FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS   FOOD,    HE    VOWED    TO   LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW HE  TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED UP  ON 
           EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.          
 UPON  FINDING  OUT  THAT EARTH HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE SETTLED FOR  COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND TO HIS JOY, THE  EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE  GOT SCAMMED OUT OF  THE CART BY 
 A  MAN NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT,  AND QUICKLY  EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!