THE   GOLDEN          
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                NUGGETS                 
           DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER          
                  FRIES                 
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                BIG MAC                 
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT  ALL  BEGAN A THOUSAND  YEARS AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE EMERGED  FROM A  TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS  ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN  TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART,  NOT  STAYING IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE LONG.  IN  THE DAY  SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE  SHE SOLD HER WARES,  AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER A  FEW  YEARS, MARIGOLDS FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.  SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND PEOPLE  TALKED  ABOUT  THE GOLDEN M. 
 THE OLD  TAVERN  HAD  THEIR MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER,  SHE BECAME  A LITTLE  TOO WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS   MEN  HOT  ON  HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD  STAY  A SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN EACH  LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED. AND SOON  ENOUGH  THERE  CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN  THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO  SHE HID THE CART,  AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,  A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS   FOUND  THE  CART.  HE  WAS  A 
     CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE    
 (CURSED, I  MEAN))  AND AS  SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE THOUGHT IT A GOOD  IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE WASN'T ALL THAT OF A COOK,  AND  EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY FELL INTO  INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND  OF A HARDHAT  AND  DIDN'T STOP 
 TRYING. THE  TAVERN DIDN'T  CARE FOR HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY   HAD   EXPANDED  TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS  IN THE  PROCESS OF  FALLING APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,   HE    VOWED   TO    LEAVE 
          KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.         
                                          
              WHICH HE DID.               
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT  HOW HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY  HE ENDED UP ON 
          EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.           
 UPON FINDING  OUT THAT  EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE  SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND  TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                 LIKED IT!                
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED OUT  OF  THE CART BY 
 A  MAN  NAMED  MICKEY MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
  WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY 
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE PROJECT,  AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!