THE   GOLDEN         
               M              
                                          
             LETS HEAR IT FOR             
             MC DONALDS             
                                          
 WHAT     CAN     I     DO     YA     FOR 
                                          
              CHEESEBURGER              
                 NUGGETS                
          DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER           
                 FRIES                  
            CARBONATED WATER            
           BEARNAISE DIP SAUCE          
                 BIG MAC                
                 COFFEE                 
                                          
                               
                                          
 IT ALL  BEGAN  A THOUSAND YEARS  AGO  IN 
 LIKE  THE  EIGHTEENTH  CENTURY.  A  DARK 
 FIGURE  EMERGED FROM  A TAVERN  AFTER  A 
 FEW YEARS APPRENTICESHIP, WITH  AN IDEA. 
 IT  WAS ILLEGAL  TO  SELL  FOOD  IN  THE 
 REGION FOR EVERYBODY EXCEPT THAT TAVERN. 
                                          
        BUT MARIGOLD DIDN'T CARE.         
                                          
 SHE  BEGAN  PUTTING  DRIED  LIZARD  MEAT 
 BETWEEN  TWO BREAD SLICES, OPERATING OUT 
 OF  A  CART, NOT  STAYING  IN  THE  SAME 
 PLACE  LONG. IN  THE DAY  SHE  SLEPT, IN 
 THE EVE  SHE  SOLD HER WARES, AND IN THE 
            NIGHT SHE POACHED.            
                                          
 AFTER  A FEW YEARS, MARIGOLDS  FOOD CART 
 HAD   A   REPUTATION.  SHE   CALLED   IT 
             THE GOLDEN M             
 AND  PEOPLE  TALKED ABOUT  THE GOLDEN M. 
 THE  OLD TAVERN HAD  THEIR  MONOPOLY AND 
      DIDN'T CHANGE THEIR MENU MUCH.      
   MARIGOLDS SECRET LIZARD FOODCART WAS   
              NEW AND FRESH.              
                                          
 HOWEVER, SHE BECAME  A LITTLE  TOO  WELL 
 KNOWN.  THE  TAVERNS  MEN  HOT  ON   HER 
 TRAIL,  SHE  COULD STAY  A  SHORTER  AND 
 SHORTER TIME IN  EACH LOCATION. SHE FELT 
 HUNTED.  AND  SOON  ENOUGH THERE CAME  A 
 TIME WHEN  THEY STARTED WATCHING FOR HER 
 AT   THE   GATES   OF   EVERY   VILLAGE. 
                                          
 SO SHE HID  THE  CART, AND  DISAPPEARED, 
                 FOREVER.                 
                                          
                                   
                                          
 AFTER   THIRTY   YEARS,  A   MAN   NAMED 
 NICHOLAS  FOUND  THE  CART.  HE   WAS  A 
    CURSED ENTREPRENEUR (THEY ALL ARE     
 (CURSED,  I  MEAN)) AND  AS SUCH  HE  OF 
 COURSE  THOUGHT IT A GOOD IDEA TO FOLLOW 
         IN MARIGOLDS FOODSTEPS.          
                                          
 HE  WASN'T ALL THAT OF  A COOK, AND EVEN 
 THOUGH SOME RECOGNIZED THE GOLDEN M,  HE 
 QUICKLY  FELL INTO INFAMITY. HOWEVER  HE 
 WAS KIND  OF A HARDHAT AND  DIDN'T  STOP 
 TRYING. THE TAVERN  DIDN'T CARE FOR  HIM 
 SINCE  NOBODY  BOUGHT  HIS  FOOD  ANYWAY 
 (AND   ALSO   THEY  HAD   EXPANDED   TOO 
   QUICKLY, SUCCUMBED TO CORRUPTION, AND  
 WAS IN  THE  PROCESS OF FALLING  APART). 
                                          
 ANGRY AT EVERYONE FOR NOT  UNDERSTANDING 
 HIS    FOOD,   HE   VOWED    TO    LEAVE 
         KIRUGU VARGIR ENTIERLY.          
                                          
               WHICH HE DID.              
                                          
                                     
                                          
 WE DONT KNOW MUCH ABOUT HOW  HE TRAVELED 
 OR WHERE, BUT EVENTUALLY HE ENDED  UP ON 
           EARTH IN THE FIFTIES.          
 UPON  FINDING OUT THAT  EARTH  HOLDS  NO 
 EDIBLE LIZARDS, HE  SETTLED FOR COW MEAT 
 INSTEAD, AND  TO HIS JOY, THE EARTH FOLK 
                LIKED IT!                 
                                          
 THEN HE GOT SCAMMED OUT OF THE  CART  BY 
 A  MAN NAMED  MICKEY  MAC  DONALDS,  WHO 
    RENAMED THE BUSINESS AFTER HIMSELF.   
 WHILE NICHOLAS QUICKLY PERISHED, MICKEY  
   FUNNELED HIS INHERITED BILLIONS INTO   
 THE  PROJECT, AND  QUICKLY  EXPANDED ALL 
             OVER THE PLANET.             
                                          
                                       
                                          
         AND THE REST IS HISTORY!