RITUALS FOR COMPUTER OPERATION
¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨@ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨¨@¨¨@¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨ @@¨¨¨¨¨¨@@
¨@¨¨¨¨@@@¨ THE COMPUTER IS A VERY COMMON TOOL IN @¨¨@@@@¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@¨¨@¨¨ THE FUTURES, AND IN SOME WAYS EVEN NOW. ¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@@
¨@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ ITS JOB IS TO DO VAST AMOUNTS OF SMALL ¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨@@@@@@@ CALCULATIONS IN A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME. ¨¨¨¨@@@@@@
¨@¨¨@@@@@¨ @@@¨¨@@@@¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨ MOST WORK ON THE PRINCIPLES OF POSING @@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨
@@@@¨¨@¨¨@ THE PROBLEM ON A HILBERT PLANE, WHICH ¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@
@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨ IS THEN FOLDED OUT OF CAUSALITY, SO @@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨
¨@¨¨@@@@@@ THAT DAEMONS CAN SOLVE THE PROBLEM @¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@@@@ WITHOUT AFFECTING REAL LIFE. (THESE ¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@@
¨@@@¨¨@@@¨ DAEMONS ARE UNDER CONTRACT WITH THE ¨@@@@¨¨@@¨
¨¨@¨¨¨¨@¨¨ COMPUTER MANUFACTURER.) ¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
@¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨ @¨¨¨¨@@@@@
¨¨@¨¨¨¨@@@ IT'S COMMONPLACE FOR PROGRAMMERS AND ¨¨@@¨¨@@@@
¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@@ CLERKS TO PRAY TO THE "GODS" OF THEIR @¨¨¨¨¨¨@@¨
@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨@ COMPUTER, OR TO THE DAEMONS DOING THE ¨¨@@@@¨¨¨¨
¨@¨¨@@@@¨¨ WORK, FOR A QUICK AND FAULT FREE ¨¨¨@@¨¨@@¨
¨¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@ OPERATION. @@¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
@@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ ¨¨¨@@@@@@@
@@@¨¨@@@@@ SOME UBIQUITOUS AND GENERALLY @@¨¨@@@@@@
@@¨¨¨¨@@@¨ NON-CONTROVERSIAL RITUALS INCLUDE: @¨¨¨¨@@@@@
@¨¨@@¨¨@¨¨ ¨¨@@¨¨@@@@
¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@ ~~# LIGHT A SCENTED CANDLE #~~ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
¨@@@@@@@¨¨ ~~# FOR QUIET AND CALM #~~ @@@@@@¨¨@¨
¨¨@@@@@¨¨¨ ¨@@@@¨¨¨¨¨
@¨¨@@@¨¨@@ ~~# RECITE A MANTRA OR OTHER #~~ ¨¨@@¨¨@@@@
¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨¨ ~~# REASSURING MESSAGE TO MAKE #~~ @¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
¨@@¨¨¨@@@@ ~~# THE COMPUTER COMFORTABLE #~~ ¨¨@@@@¨¨@¨
¨¨¨¨@¨¨@@@ ~~# AND AT EASE #~~ @¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨
@@@¨¨¨¨¨@@ ¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@@
@@¨¨@@@¨¨¨ ~~# SOME LIKE TO SAY A BRIEF #~~ ¨@@@@¨¨@@@
@¨¨¨¨@¨¨@@ ~~# PRAYER FOR SOLACE, TO BE #~~ ¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@@
¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨@ ~~# LEFT ALONE DURING THEIR WORK #~~ @¨¨¨¨@@¨¨@
¨¨¨¨¨@@@¨¨ ¨¨@@¨¨¨¨¨¨
@@@@¨¨@¨¨¨ ~~# OFFER A CUP OF STEAMING TEA #~~ @¨¨¨¨@@@@@
@@@¨¨¨¨¨@@ ~~# OR A MEAL TO THE MACHINES #~~ ¨¨@@¨¨@@@@
@@¨¨@@@¨¨@ ~~# (SOMETIMES, BY FEY RULES, #~~ @¨¨¨¨¨¨@@@
@¨¨¨¨@¨¨¨¨ ~~# THE DAEMONS ARE ALLOWED #~~ ¨¨@@@@¨¨@@
¨¨@@¨¨¨@@@ ~~# TO RESPOND TO THIS) #~~ ¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@
¨¨¨¨¨@¨¨@@ @@¨¨¨¨@@¨¨
@@@@¨¨¨¨¨¨ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ¨¨¨@@¨¨¨¨@
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WOULD YOU CONSIDER CODE GOLF
TO BE A KIND OF PRAYER?
AS IN, YOU MAKE A CONVOLUTED,
INTRICATE, BEAUTIFUL, AND USELESS
ARTIFACT. AS IN, YOU'RE USING YOUR
SKILLS TO ASK FOR SOMETHING,
...I'D ASK FOR A HANDFUL OF BUGS?
CODE HAS BUGS, LOTS OF IT.