EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN  THE WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT  KNOW  HOW USEFUL THEY HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM,  THE  LAST FEW TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE  EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO  NOT  LIKE, AND THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH   RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR A 
 LONG  TIME I  COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I SHOULD AVOID TO RUIN  ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED  OR  AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES  STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID   NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I  JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND  MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD  OF CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE  THEY ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF I  DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK  WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY  EYES,   NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER JUST FIELDS  AND  MOTION. 
 NOW  AND THEN I  HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT  IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I  THINK IT  HAS TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.