EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS    THINKING   TO   STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW  USEFUL THEY HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST FEW  TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF  SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT LIKE,  AND THERE WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH  RANDOM   THINGS  THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I  SHOULD AVOID TO RUIN  ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR  AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS IN 
 THE   EYES,   AND  SOMETIMES  STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY   DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST  DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED  AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD  OF  CONCEPTS THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS,  IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH,  RATHER JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN  I HEAR  THIS SOUND (A REAL 
    SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME     
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT  IS  ALWAYS UNPLEASANT, I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT  I THINK IT HAS  TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.