EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING    TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE I 
 DO NOT KNOW HOW  USEFUL  THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM,  THE LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY  OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT LIKE, AND THERE  WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM   THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME I  COULD  NOT SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND I  SHOULD AVOID TO RUIN ALL  THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK  TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND MAKING  ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A LOAD OF  CONCEPTS THIS  "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE  DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE   MY  EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I  HEAR THIS  SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT  IS ALWAYS UNPLEASANT, I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT  I  THINK IT HAS TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.