EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS    THINKING   TO   STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS  IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE I 
 DO  NOT KNOW HOW  USEFUL THEY  HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST  FEW TIMES AT LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE  PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY DO  NOT LIKE, AND THERE  WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM   THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD  NOT SEE  A CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING ANXIOUS 
 ... AND  I SHOULD  AVOID TO RUIN ALL THE 
             SEASONS THIS WAY.            
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED  OR  AT LEAST THE BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES  STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING   NOW,  THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I  JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M  SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A  LOAD OF CONCEPTS  THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK  WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,   NOT  ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW  AND THEN I HEAR THIS SOUND (A  REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS  ALWAYS UNPLEASANT, I  BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT  I THINK IT  HAS TO DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.