EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING   TO    STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE  WINTER BECAUSE  I 
 DO  NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL  THEY HAVE BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW TIMES AT  LEAST,  AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT  I 
 REALLY DO NOT  LIKE,  AND THERE  WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS  WITH  RANDOM   THINGS   THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE, FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME I  COULD NOT  SEE  A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ...  AND I  SHOULD AVOID TO RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
     HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA    
 INCREASED OR  AT LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,   THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST  DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M  SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES TO  ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT A  LOAD OF CONCEPTS THIS  "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I DO  NOT  SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER  BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST  FIELDS AND MOTION. 
 NOW AND THEN I  HEAR THIS SOUND  (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT  IS ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT,  I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT HAS TO  DO 
         WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.