EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS   THINKING    TO    STOP   DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO NOT KNOW HOW  USEFUL THEY  HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN I  TAKE 
 THEM, THE LAST FEW  TIMES  AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE  ARE PLENTY OF SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT  LIKE,  AND THERE WILL BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH  RANDOM   THINGS  THAT  I 
 HAPPEN  TO SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR  A 
 LONG  TIME  I  COULD NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF  LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING ANXIOUS 
 ... AND  I SHOULD AVOID  TO RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED OR AT  LEAST THE  BURN-INS  IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND   SOMETIMES   STUFF  IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,   THEY  DID  NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE. BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK  TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M  SCARED AND MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO ME  SOMETIMES  THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD OF CONCEPTS  THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND  HOW  VAGUE THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT SLEEP  FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER BE DARK WHEN  I 
 CLOSE  MY   EYES,  NOT  ACTUALLY   CEV'S 
 THOUGH,  RATHER JUST FIELDS  AND MOTION. 
 NOW  AND THEN I  HEAR THIS SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND IT  IS  ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I THINK  IT  HAS TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.