EH                    
                                          
                                         
                                          
 I   WAS    THINKING   TO   STOP    DOING 
 HALLUCINOGENS IN  THE WINTER  BECAUSE  I 
 DO NOT KNOW  HOW USEFUL  THEY HAVE  BEEN 
 ANYWAY?  I  GET  SO  TENSE  WHEN  I TAKE 
 THEM, THE  LAST  FEW TIMES AT LEAST, AND 
 THERE ARE PLENTY OF  SIDE EFFECTS THAT I 
 REALLY  DO NOT  LIKE, AND THERE WILL  BE 
   ASSOCIATIONS WITH THESE MINI-ANXIETY   
 ATTACKS   WITH  RANDOM  THINGS  THAT   I 
 HAPPEN  TO  SEE...  FOR  EXAMPLE,  FOR A 
 LONG TIME  I  COULD  NOT  SEE A  CERTAIN 
 KIND  OF LEAF  WITHOUT  GETTING  ANXIOUS 
 ... AND  I SHOULD AVOID TO  RUIN ALL THE 
            SEASONS THIS WAY.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
    HMM, RECENTLY MY VISUAL PHENOMENA     
 INCREASED OR AT  LEAST  THE  BURN-INS IN 
 THE   EYES,  AND  SOMETIMES   STUFF   IS 
 BREATHING  NOW,  THEY  DID   NOT  DO  IT 
 BEFORE.  BUT MAYBE I JUST DRANK TOO MUCH 
 COFFEE. MAYBE I'M SCARED AND  MAKING ALL 
             THESE THINGS UP.             
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IT  COMES  TO  ME  SOMETIMES THAT  SHIT, 
 WHAT  A LOAD OF CONCEPTS  THIS "REALITY" 
 CONSISTS  OF,  AND HOW  VAGUE  THEY  ARE 
                                          
                                         
                                          
 IF  I  DO  NOT  SLEEP FOR  ABOUT  TWENTY 
 HOURS, IT WILL NO LONGER  BE DARK WHEN I 
 CLOSE  MY  EYES,   NOT   ACTUALLY  CEV'S 
 THOUGH, RATHER  JUST FIELDS AND  MOTION. 
 NOW  AND THEN I HEAR THIS  SOUND (A REAL 
     SOUND (I THINK)), RESEMBLING SOME    
  "KNERP" FROM TWENTYFIVE C NBOME OR SO.  
 AND  IT IS  ALWAYS  UNPLEASANT, I BECOME 
 SO STRESSFUL, BUT I  THINK IT  HAS TO DO 
        WITH THE NOVELTY. I HOPE.